Possibly Forever Alone

I don't even know where to start love is a tricky thing to understand i guess a single word can break the strongest relationship or even just save it i'm guessing for most people to be able to even get one its easy to break up a relationship but its hard to even start one for most people they are shy and that keeps them from doing anything a girl could be shy and want to wait for the boy to say something and the boy could be the same therefor the relationship goes no where and even when you in on its hard to stay in it it was hard for me two of my ex's showed no love at all towards me and one broke up with me for my best friend all because i didn't do or say much but it wasn't like i didn't love her it was because i was to shy at the time and had no idea what to do after a long time i was never sure of myself on what to do cause i was afraid of rejection i guess its common for most people right well there's also more to it that made me believe was the reason no one would like me i cant drive not because i was to lazy to learn but cause i unfortunately was born with seizures and a learning problem i am kinda slow to understand stuff but i do my best to keep on going but alas the seizures got in the way of most things the doctor said i had to be seizure free for one whole year and with out my medication to keep it in check before i could learn how to drive but things never worked out but i never gave it a thought cuz i knew it would only put me down but i was never all that lucky girls don't talk to me to much and i don't have to many friends just one but i'm happy with just one we hang out but iv never known what it was like to actually be invited over somewhere to have fun im writing this in hopes that maby someone would be my friend and maby i can be lucky enough to meet someone who can look past my seizures and either want to be my friend or in other cases for the girls maby get a girlfriend but even if i don't end up with a gf a friend will be awesome too
shade13a shade13a
18-21, M
5 Responses Nov 30, 2012

In the uk,often with the support of a charity or something like that,people with similar conditions sometimes get together in a house or flat share.Sometimes there is a support worker actually living on site,just in case something happens that the flat mates cant handle.
Maybe there is something similar in the us? This would give you some independance,increasing your self esteem,as well as peer support.I dont know your financial situation and of course its none of my business,but i do realise that health options for those of modest means in the u.s. can be limited.I hope there might be something positive you can take away from this evenings conversation with myself and others,if nothing else,that you musn't judge ep straight away.Given time the likelihood is that someone will see what you've written and respond.Take Care....

(Continued from below)Put thoughts of a girlfriend to the back of your mind,get involved,help out,enjoy yourself and brighten others days at the same time.You will feel lighter and happier and that sort of person is an ATTRACTIVE person,so who knows!!If people in your current social scene dont value you,find another one.You wouldn't hold on to a wasp to let it repeatedly sting you,so why hang around people that hurt you?Anyway,dont give up,its a big world out there where small town attitudes dont matter.
Best Wishes.....

thx it just feels hard to do than it does to say

Yeah, it can seem like it.But I have to believe that the world is essentially good and that there are nice people out there in the "Real World"and on ep.Well rounded people that value a person for who they are,not on if they can drive or discriminating against someone because they have health issues and learning issues.Maybe empathy,the ability to imagine yourself living with the same situation and what it feels like,is a dying art.I hope not because it is where compassion starts and a communicating relationship begins.
Have you had this story up since november and just decided 2 hours ago to check responses? I can well understand your response"Guess no one really cares right".WELL I CARE.And it moved me to write.You know,if socialising in the mainstream,and what you've described,the shallow people you've met well many people look to peer groups for social interaction.Maybe you could search the web for any support groups for your kind of seizure's.Perhap's there are also organizations in your area running social events for learning disabled,i mean ok some might be more disabled and not what you would consider "Girlfriend Material",(I'm gonna open a new Window B4 this crashes..)

the issue is that i live in jersey not much happens here and im unable to get out of the house

oh and i actually remembered righting this i havent been on ep in a long time

you're YOUNG!! you will find someone soon...try being thirty and single now that is harder. from ur pic ur good looking, girls must fancy you surely!! :)

its not that easy i cant drive or live on my own cuz i have seizures so it puts ppl off

guess no one really cares right