I Now Moan The Man I Fell In Love With

As you all know I have been with my 2 sons in Canada for the last 4 years, he last 3 years 6 months have been an emotional rollercoast ride.

When I first came over to Canada my Husband treated me like I was the most important person, he could not do enough for my boys and I, I thought all my boast finally came into the harbour, and did not sink,

But then cracks started to appear, in his personallity, he became not so loving , started to get aggressive, all the friends I started making here in Toronto were not good enough, he started to judge me, told me I was much more then that, and did not need friends like I chose.

See my friends have always been mixed and match, from a lady vet, to office workers, shop workers, Native Indian, no matter what background, even the homeless man on the street corner,  I see them as humans, no matter what back ground or money status,

I just love people, and want to help who I can,when I can, even if i just have time to talk.....

Anyway my husbands emotional demons came out more and more.It is like as if he was taken over by someone else..

He was one of the victims of the article link

http://www.ctv.ca/servlet/ArticleNews/story/CTVNews/1050262355275_41/

When I saw the court report, from his case I started to understand, who my husband was,

The nice man I married and fell in love with actually only existed for a few months, because I truly now believe he could have been that nice guy, but he died when he was 14 years old, when he was abuse  so badly and his true spirit died.

He started more and more to be aggressive, then when my landed immigrant status failed, he wanted to start to fight for me to stay in Canada, bad the dark side always won and he become abussive , angry, he never hit me, but it was torcher me been called names,

He started taking more and more medication, and today  what happened, has no landed him in the mental ward,

I was calling all numbers to get help, he was upstairs, getting more and more weired, each time I was checking on him..He turned the bedroom upside  down, sat on the edge of the bed, talking to his dad, who has been dead for more then 25 years, I just agreed then the phone rang

I went downstairs to answer it, I was on the phone for quite a while when he came downstairs  well actually stumbling downstairs asked me for his cigaretts he had a quilt wrapped around him no top on just jeans, no socks or shoes.

I said sorry I have not got your cigaretts, and went into the kitchen saying to the Lady I talked to I need to get of the phone..anyway it took me 5 minutes longer.Then I thought i better check on him , and when I went upstairs he was no there,

He must have well he did ran out of the house with no top on no shoes or socks and the quite around him.

Anyway I checked the whole house again, went to my neighbours house and she offered to drive me around to see if we can locate him, but we had no luck then we called the police, and were informed he was picked up, and they will take him to the hostpital, because my husband told the police his name was Lee, but that is not his name  that is my sons name.

I feel so sad now, that the man I married is no more, is like he died today.

Now I think what will happen to my boys and I now, is even worse because Christmas is just a few days away, and we do not even have anything for Christams, no tree no nothing, But to be honest the only thing I wish for my boys and I to have

Is our Freedom, to stay here in Canada, for me to be able to work, and give my boys some kind of life.

I do not want to lose my Husky Indy either or my dog Charlie, or my sons cat Babba

all the animals I rescued out of very bad situations  Indy is my dog I nursed her back to health, she was very badly abused I had to feed her for a year by hand because she was to frightened to eat on her own, also she did  not howl, it took me 1 year learning her to howl again Thanks to Utube and a husky who is howling Happy Birthday on there..

Anyway that is what happened today,  after my first post.

Thanks for all your advice, the people who believe in God please say a Prayer for the bos the animals and myself, for the people who don't believe AND READ THIS,  Thank you perhaps you can write ....for all of you on here

Have a great Christmas, Thank you for all of you  Thank you for been you.

Bless you all