Solitude, Peace, Self-reliance...and Lonely But Love It Too!
Hello fellow people!
Well, although I enjoy a lot of alone time; solitude, tranqulity, and silence, it gets to the point of desiring company. I look back in my past and I have always been consistently reserved, and in my own world; or to myself at least. There was a time when I wanted many friends and would have loved to be in a group of good people who were strong, supportive and intelligent. However it has been difficult finding those type of people who I mesh with. I am now 24 turning 25 and have to disconnect from another friend, which leaves me again with a very low support base. This friend I knew for 4 years or so but didn't know significant personality traits about him; because I just moved in with him. What has been revealed to me is his rash snobbiness; his arrogance, his disrespect, degradation, and ego. He has offended me from each of these areas directly, I have addressed them but to no prevail and I will not put up with it anymore. Sometimes I think, is it me? Sometimes it is, becuase I do hold vigorous and rigorous standards for human beings; simultaneously they are practical and should be inherent! Stark honesty, high morale, high integrity, astute, genuine and respect, among many other things. I have tried to go out and meet people and obtain phone numbers but the people I find I enjoy do not keep up their contact. Many have told me I am a good person but expect too much from people; and I am confident to believe the same but how can I just be friends with people who do not have the core aspects of what is important in a friendship? I belive I am just not finding the right people therefore I feel I don't fit in anywhere other than in my own self-reliance.