Hardly Falling Easy.

I know I don’t have big tragic problems, nothing that sets me apart from the next teenager. But I am looking for some help and advice.

I am sixteen years old and I still haven’t had my first kiss. I think I know kind of why, I read a lot and my expectations of a boy are kind of higher then they should be but something inside me refuses to allow me to be myself around a guy I like. If I try to push past it, it’s like it’s not really me talking, I’m just saying what I think I would say because I’m too shy to really be me. Does that make sense?

I also have this thing where once I decide I really like a guy, I like him for a long period of time. I liked and still like this guy that I met a little over two years ago. I think we got along great in middle school but once I decided I liked him a little, I started to like him a lot and as the amount of time I liked him grew, so did my feelings for him. They grew so much that my shy curse kicked in and I couldn’t goof and joke with him anymore because I was so scared I would do something to put him off and we would never be together. I really like him and I’m asking for help that I can’t ask of anyone I know. My friend told me to just talk to him but I’m too terrified at what might happen. I couldn’t bare it if he didn’t like me! Words cannot describe how much I hate my hormones right now.

sweetsicksteen sweetsicksteen
18-21, F
3 Responses Feb 16, 2010

thank you guys, your comments help more than you can imagine :)

i can totally understand how you feel. i'm 17, never been on a date. don't blame yourself for your expectations. it is perfectly natural!<br />
and, think about it.. maybe you should tell this guy. it's worth a shot. if he likes you back and has been shy to tell you, then wow! if not, he sounds like a nice guy. it'll help the friendship, trust me. maybe that will grow into something more :)

I know the feeling. I'm almost 20 right now and I am a guy so take that into consideration when you read this. At your age I hadn't had a kiss yet either nor had I dated anyone. I also held girls in a high regard which isn't bad but also was realistic. One day after finally having enough loneliness for 16 years I just had enough and I sat down during lunch one day by myself. I came to the conclusion that if I wanted to not be lonely I would have to make it so. <br />
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The next day I went and sat with my female friends. I began to scope them out and to find which one was single and I felt the most comfortable with. I began to talk to her more often until she would talk to me by text without me trying to talk to her. I noticed how she would sit, talk and act differently around me until one day during lunch I asked her "Why are you single? You are a good looking girl and have an awesome personality so what is the problem?" She laughed and replied "The right guy hasn't asked me yet." I sat there in silence for what was 10 seconds but felt like an hour before asking her out on a date.<br />
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Long story short: As weird as it sounds look at your friends. You have your reason for selecting them to be your friends but have you thought about being anything more with any of them? I bet at least one of your male friends, that is probably awesome for you, has a crush on you and you just don't realize it.