Fight It All And Win, But Disqualified At The Finish Line. My Life Of Disappointment.

Have you ever felt like you’ve won the race, but the prize was taken away form you?

To feel so deserving but told you don’t deserve?

Welcome to my life.

If you want to know WHO I am, look at my profile, and with that in mind, my life is ever lasting disappointment. I know kids like a guy named Reed who every weekend goes out and parties. I infact talked to him today at work (we work right across form one another) and he was talking about a party in a near by college town. I asked him to call me and let me know, I would supply a bottle of vodka… But I know he won’t call me, cause no one does.

I know another kid who is in town and is inviting people over tonight just to hang out and watch the Hangover, a kid who I have known for years and I guess you could call “friends”, I texted him, and his girlfriend (who happens to be a friend as well) about it and neither will respond. Even though I helped out this girl with something very frustrating to her recently, It’s all for nothing on my end.

And I really have no one else. Even my best friend, or who used to be my best friend, will not help me out with this loneliness. He infact screwed me over just last week by inviting me to a party, but wouldn’t dell me where, So I asked him to pic me up. He did not of course. So I sat at home alone again on Saturday. Then I go and confront him on it the next day and he said “Oh no man I didn’t go, I heard it sucked” … WHILE HE WAS LOOKING AT THE PICS FROM THE PARTY ON HIS FACEBOOK… So I told him he must think I’m a fuckign idiot, and he catches on what was up on his computer. He then said, “You said you didn’t want to go”. I gave him the finger right there and told him he was an asswipe and left that at that.

This is why I sit here alone, this is why I don't have a girlfriend, this is why I am lonely. Is it me? Is it other people? WHY, I"M SICK OF NOT KNOWING WHY!

Fight To Win, Disqualified in the End

WHY, do I work so hard for all I want, but yet it seems that the further I run to get to my goal, the further and further away I am. I win win win, but I keep losing. WHY, WHY DO I LIVE LIKE THIS!? WHY GOD!??!

BlueJohn46 BlueJohn46
18-21, M
Feb 26, 2010