I need to do somethings new i have to make a difference a huge difference cuz this is not a way to live. I want to start today right now. I need to get out more in the sun. I need to stop going to creepy places alone at night, it's dangerous to be alone in empty streets where nobody is around. I need to make more art. I need to fight through the pain not surrender to it. I have to get myself free out of this illness. I need to get more fresh air. I need to play new video games. I need to focus on college. I need to listen to new bands, weird songs, crazyy music. I need to get hyper and crazyy (in a good way) lol. I need to watch new movies. I need to stay away from depressive places and negative people. I need to hold my angel in my arms and let her know how much she really means to me. I just simply neeeeed a new begining. A new start where i am free from this pain especially the pyhsical, a start where i can be me where there's no more fake smiles and much less tears except if it is tears of happiness . No more crying. No more feeling pity for myself. No more abusive people. No more lies and pain. No more doctors. Just a simple good life.