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I Am Losing My Best Friend

He's My Best Friend But I'm Not His...and It Hurts

By: papercastles
Written on May 25th, 2010


Tomorrow, my best friend is going back home to Spain. Today was his last day, and instead of spending it around the flat with me, he chose to not even speak to me and go out for the entire time with a vietnamese girl who giggles a lot and can flirt and who he obviously likes a lot more. I don't know why I'm never anybody's that kind of person if you know what I mean. A few months ago he had a close girl friend- then the girl friend got a boyfriend and it seems like he used me to fill the gap until the vietnamese girl came along. And, of course, my brain is saying: "it's because you're fat and lumpy and awkward and ugly and she only weighs about six stone and of course he's going to want to spend his last day with her".

It is a bit gutting because I'm going to miss him appallingly and we've pretty much done everything together for the last few months. It's just the fact that he didn't even want to see me on his last day that upsets me so much. I thought writing this might help but it's making me feel like crying. I really wanted to walk with him to the station tomorrow but I think probably I won't be welcome because vietnamese girl is going. I'm not happy...basically fed up with being used by everyone when they don't have anyone else.
By: papercastles
Age: 22-25 , Female
2,024 people have read this story

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4 responses
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    superspy898
    superspy898

    I know what you mean this guy comes in are class the new guy and suddenly 3 rummors are around the school ,that he's been to juve ect.Last year I noticed that he was having trouble with math so I offered to toutr him.As the year progressed I got to know him better and better until we were bff's.I feel so bad that I believed some of thoes rummors.If I had not offered to toutr him we probly would have never even spoken to each other.

    Aug 26, 2010
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    redtailfree48
    redtailfree48

    Thanks Catles

    Jun 1, 2010
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    papercastles
    papercastles

    thank you :)



    I'm so sorry you lost a loved one...I hope it's going ok for you

    May 29, 2010
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    redtailfree48
    redtailfree48

    Hello Castles, I kow its hard being the support of others when they feel alone and by there way of thanking you for being there for him or her is to do the same. I know how it feels to lose the one that you care very much for and loved, her situation was very different, in fact she was the giving, carrying type of person I considdered an angel and she still is. She passed away a couple of days ago and I understood why but I am still trying to wrap my brain around it because at this point its a bad dream.

    Some people can be so self centered that they don't see the real person, not whast on the outside but the inside. By not going to the station saved you from jore heart aches hon and because talking about it shows you are looking for answeres and by crying shows you have a wonderful heart.

    May 26, 2010
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