So What Now?

Hmmm, I have read a few stories here and I  feel better knowing I'm not the only one in this situation! I am married 13 years with young kids. I love my husband and our family. The problem is sex. We do not have any! I'm not sure what happened really. It went from all the time to practically non existent! Both of us are guilty. We don't even approach each other anymore! It's like this giant white elephant in the bedroom that we know is there, yet we don't speak of it. This kills me to say but I'm not attracted to him anymore. I don't think he is either. Can attraction be brought back into a marriage? I don't want a divorce either. I'm a sensual woman and long for passion. I've never cheated but I look. What to do, what to do...
Raven242 Raven242
41-45, F
3 Responses May 22, 2012

I've been married for 18 years and unlike many of the stories I've read here I'm the one longing for passion and intimacy. I long for my wife but like our life and sex is routine. It has turned into us just doing our duty. I'm a very sexual male and do not want to cheat or a divorce but like much in our relationship that fringes on her self confidence talking about it is taboo.

Have you thought about doing a date night? Or doing something that you all used to do but havent done in a while? Get a baby sitter, dress up, get a mani/pedi and bring the spark back...Sometimes it only takes 1 person to step up to the plate :) Let me know if you need ideas on at home fun times - I have several role playing activities that drives my hubby crazy :)

u ought to share some of your ideas. my husband told me " we have been together so long that i feel like i know everything about u " at this point we are bored.

LOL @richdeb4ok - Of course I'll share...one big is example is catch your hubby off guard...one day my hubby came home from work and I was all showered, smelling good, hair done, make-up oh so cute with a sexy maid's outfit and some heels...I was seriously cleaning (vacumming) but when I heard him coming in the door, i was bending over wiping down the furniture...The visual was all he needed :) I know some people get shy about dressing up - take a drink, shot, etc...or whatever to calm the nerves...

Go ahead and have sex with someone else. Life is too short and it can be way to long when you are not happy. Non-horny people stay that way.