I Am Married But Lonely

Where Did I Go And Where Can I Find Her

By: cutemom79

Written on January 27th, 2013

This story is a confession ...i am 33, have three children, been married 16 years, have a large group of awesome friends. I got married at 17, not because of pregnacy but because i was head over feet in love...i have never been drunk, done drugs, or even smoked...its not to brag but just to kinda let u know who I am...one little problem, one year ago i had a 6 month long affair with another man that my husband is clueless about...has almost destroyed me, as i deserve...but im trying to move on. There are many many details that go with my story, of course. Im trying to be the person I thought i was before.. but i cant seem to find her...try not to judge, I have always wondered how people could ever do that...its easier than you think....

By: cutemom79

Age: 31-35 , Female

215 people have read this story

Email:

Username:

Password:

Birthday:

By clicking "Post", you confirm that you agree to the Terms of Service of Experience Project, Inc.

12 responses

paigeclark

The truth will set you free. The only way in my book for you to find the old you is to confess to your husband. Coming from a man that has been cheated on multiple times, I would much rather my ex tell me herself. The feeling of being cheated on is the worst pain I have ever experienced in my life, but living a lie won't help you find the old you. I'm sorry this sounds stern but think if the tables were turned and he was cheating on you...wouldn't you want to know?

Jan 29
1 like
- cutemom79
  I understand and it seems rational..but i once told him i was tempted to cheat and he freaked out and shut down...i know i need to tell him, but i just dont think i can...and if he cheated and knew it was a mistake and never did it again i would not want him to tell me, i promise...i feel its selfish of me to put that on him..i dont know..but thanks for your advice.
  
  Jan 29
  1 like
Johnny905

we all have ups and downs....the thing is to be posittive ad more forward, you wont be the same again but you can be a new HER......always look forward.....

Jan 28
1 like
didntwantthis

Innocence lost... In other words, you can never be who you once were. You must learn to love the new you, because this is who you are now. I am sorry for the price of this wisdom. Unfortunately you have joined the club of those who couldn't resist temptation. Life is too short, so why not be happy?

Jan 28
1 like
- cutemom79
  Thank you..im trying everyday to be happy:)
  
  Jan 28
  1 like
Lookseen

What are your real reasons for doing it? Thats the first question.

Jan 28
2 likes
- cutemom79
  I still often cant believe i did it...it was out of being lonely...my husband is a good man but will not share or talk with me about anything...it is still a problem because i am still tempted to cheat even after i know the agony it causes...
  
  Jan 28
  1 like
- Lookseen
  You have to work out why you are lonely as it points to a problem in your relationship that you cant ignore forever.. Sleeping with other men to make you feel good will feel great while you are at it and then your problem is still there. You are still married to the same guy with same person.. you have some soul searching to do and some choices.
  
  Jan 28
  1 like
- cutemom79
  I know i do...i had never been with any man other than my husband, until the affair and only had sex one with him once...its not the sex its the attention of feeling wanted..it can be quiet addicting, but at a high price..hope i can get my crap together:/
  
  Jan 28
  1 like
- Lookseen
  I know you just want to be wanted honey. I know too well but it is not a decent way to be. Just saying an affair wont make you feel really loved but only for a moment. Is it really enough? Not for me is it for you?
  
  Jan 28
  1 like
1 More Reply
bebozico

u have to think about kids future and u must find some one u trust to speak with him honstly to help u then u will find her

Jan 28
1 like
- cutemom79
  Thank you:)
  
  Jan 28
  1 like

Your Response