Alone Even When Surrounded By Other People

While I am happily married ... although a few people would disagree with the 'happy' part ... I feel as if I am happily married for I love my husband and I love being married to him.

I just hate feeling lonely even when I am surrounded by a bunch of people.  My son and I moved to the Philippines last December to be with my husband and our family there.  But I don't speak the language, and while everyone can speak English, no one does.  So this leaves me without friends and when my husband is too busy with work or too busy with his internet cafe, and my son is too busy with his online games and his new friends ... I get left out.

I didn't have many friends when I lived in the States, but at least it was easier and safer to travel alone if I wanted to get out of the house.  While I have never feared for my safety, a white foreign woman is not advised to travel alone without an escort here, even if I am married.  Most of my friends have always been online, very few if any were real life ... but now that I have moved a half a world away and my times online are different ... I have even lost most of them.

So everday I sit and twiddle my thumbs, trying to occupy myself with my online schooling and my online job, but there is only so much of that, that I can take before I go nuts being alone.

UselessTidbits UselessTidbits
31-35, F
6 Responses Mar 1, 2010

everyone has a place in this world and I am a firm beleiver that as long as you are where you are, you will make a huge differance. It isn't about where you are, how you got there and where you want to be, its about not giving up on yourself.

I was reading a post where a young lady said I wish I could feel the virtual hug. If you can feel this Tidbits this is for you (((TIDBITS)))) Add me to your circle ok? lets talk.

@ Coffee: Thank you, I guess I just needed to hear it.<br />
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@ Redtail: I cannot learn the language until I have someone willing to help teach it to me, it is a hard language to learn without taking to the natives to pick up on the true way they speak. Plus I have to learn Tagalog and Bisayan both. Even my husband is too busy to try to teach me the language, and the only one of his family who would talk to me moved too far away to meet up with everyday. I am slowly adjusting to the culture which I have studied extensively, but it's the loneliness that I cannot adjust too, I'm used to having someone who will offer that hug needed when feeling down, or that encouraging word for tough times. I did add you to my circle, thank you for the offers and things, I appreciate it.

Theres a philosophy of mine Coffee, I believe that it takes a special person to pick up on a special person.

Tidbits, you have a friend here. I am open to anything you want to talk about. I am a very good listener and I do not solicet and advice unless asked. I think as time does go by, you will adjust. We humans have the abuility to adjust to our new surroundings. Why not take up the language? Perhas check into some of the soft ware that offers language training. That be a first steop for you. And if you haven't, learn there culture and take it form there. If you wish to add me to your circle, please do so and I will do the same ok?

You are a very special person.