My Solitude

I have been married for 5 years now and we have 2 beautiful angels but my loneliness is killing me!!!.I really wanted to build a happy home.Deep inside my heart I feel like I made the biggest mistake of my life.I thought I found my soulmate but I guess I was wrong.He is selfish and sometimes he does not even realise that he is abusing me verbally.Most of the time he goes out with his friends and return home very late.We don't have any connection anymore.I am trapped in this marriage cause I am still financially unstable to take care of my kids by myself.I can't even smell the flowers anymore when I wake up.I am so miserable.

Valentino1 Valentino1
26-30, F
3 Responses Mar 11, 2010

Hon, I am going to ask you a question and I want you to be totally honest with yourself. Was he the same way when you dated him? We don't change just because we got married. This is for men and women. We are who we are and sometimes our "love" blinds us from seeing those things we don't want to see because we need to have "love" My heart hurts for you because no one should feel lonely. First step, TALK to your husband. Tell him what you are feeling and what is making your feel that way. TRY NOT to accuse. Use I statements. I know it sounds corny, but I've been through marriage counseling : ) If he's not willing to compromise and work with you in building a secure relationship, then you have to put yourself and your children first. Find something that will build your self esteem and give you a sense of independence. Pinpoint those specific things that you want from your husband. Be reasonable and fair. I wish you luck.

Valentino1<br />
I don't have any advice but I hear this so much my son in law treates my daughter the same way. And if i look back I trated my wife the same way. Thing is I'm kind of on the recieving end right now I basicaly don't get any affection from my wife. like i said i hear this so much so i know your not alone. I believe guys are by far the most guilty. ( I use to do a lot of counseling) I think we get married for the wrong reason we go in thinking what we can get out of the marriage instead of going in thinking how we can serve the person we are marrying i believe age does play into it it alot but deffently not allways. <br />
Good luck God Bless<br />
Bob (If you need a mans perspective give me a yell)

I know exactly how you feel. It is hard when you feel like you are going through life all alone. If you need to talk I will listen. Good luck.