There Is No Intimacy, In Any Form, In My Marriage

I feel ur pain , it's the same over here I sleep on my own and huge a pillow cuz I love to cuddle I miss the warmth of a body laying next to me , I love been touched but my husband rather sleeping on the couch than with me

One, I'd like to know what happened. Are you ok? Two all i can say between the tears is ditto though we are not legally married been together ten years and i feel like I'll never find anyone again now i am older.

I CAN TOTALLY relate !!! RIght now the hardest thing for me is doing what i feel i know i need to do but it makes me sick to think about it.

I, too, live in a marriage without intimacy or emotional support. I have been married for 29 years and, unfortunately, it began once we said our vows. My husband continually says that it is him but and he will do better; but, after 29 years, I have exhausted all hope. I was pretty and thin when we married and remained that way for many years. Now I am old and fat because I've allowed myself to hang onto hope which caused a continual flood of private tears and devastation. I am a christian and believe that marriage is a commitment with God and my husband. That said, I would encourage anyone married to a man or woman who is incapable of intimacy to walk away. My husband had many issues with *********** and fantasy. He did cheat on me at first but is not now. He simply lives and walks in his own life and I'm here to do the bills and make sure he keeps up his image to the outside world. He's let me know that he is very content and has no desire to change the situation. Last year I moved into my own room hoping he would sense the loss. What a joke, he's happier than ever. I hate to be negative, but run from a relationship that causes this kind of sorrow. I am determining from today on to work on me. I have not left because I have issues of my own and simply do not want to take the risk of future rejections.

I am so happy that I am not the only one going through this. I've been married for six months and had more sex in my carnal, single days than I have as a married woman. I know I am highly attractive but the lack of sexual desire from my husband is slowly driving me crazy. This is not what I imagined marriage to be. I expected uncontrollable passionate love- and as a Christian woman, I keep asking myself why god would make me go through this when I was celibate by choice shortly before getting married. Instead of being rewarded I feel punished. I don't want to cheat but I refuse to become depressed over the effect this is having on my self esteem

Communicate with him, check his answers one last time and make your move.

A woman your age has many romps in bed and lovely walks through the pasture holding hands.. Sitting on the creek bank dangeling your feet in the water holding hands and kissing..

what can i say y everybody do such marriages whichis like burden

I feel your pain. I too am living with my husband but we are simply two ships that pass in the night. I miss being kissed, hugged and making love. I feel so rejected. I have tried many times to talk about my feelings with my husband. Usually he ignores me, sometimes he says he wants thing to change and he misses the way we used to be together too but he never makes any attempt to change or make things better. I want to stay but I sometimes feel that if I did leave I would truely be alone forever.

you so mirror my sediments and how it was for me...is truly sad and i so agree with you ...you try and try then finally ck out and emotionally you are done... lets connect plz

Your husband is content because he is not having to take part in sexual activity or intimacy which he finds unnecessary or distasteful. Have you asked him whether he would mind if you were to outsource your needs so that he never had to worry about you making unwanted demands on his body? Would he actually be jealous that someone else is relieving him of tasks which he finds too odious or boring to take part in himself? It always seems odd to me that our room mates should feel jealous of someone else having something that they do not want themselves.

Richard

I am in the same situation. My wife and I seem like less than roomates. I don't know what to do. I totally understand what you are going through. It is frustrating and very very lonely

so mirrors my marriage that eventually ended i would lov t chat w u...am carpenterjim65 on yahoo if u desire to talk

My Dear Lady, he chose what he wanted and it's not you! I hate to say that, but you said it before me. A marriage without, communication, romance, patience, understanding, thoughtfulness, caring, sharing, and most important, listening to what the other has to say to you. In this case he needs help and you get out before he turns vicious, or really hurts you, I have a suspicion he already has beaten you, or hurt you in some way. Please, I beg you, get out now!!!!! If you need help, please let me know and I will help you.

Your story sounds so much like mine, except I have only had sex 4 times in the past 3.5 years! I even read "50 shades of grey" hoping to get a few new ideas that might interest my husband of 20 years. My only accomplishment was the feeling that I had made a fool of myself...my husband is very passive aggressive so trying to discuss anything is out of the question. He drinks a fair amount and has said he won't stop so I feel he chose alcohol over me. Now he is into *********** on the Internet ...again, I take issue with it but he continues any way. I am in the process of making plans to leave...

I've read most of the comments and answer, it's the same thing over and over, Get out, leave him. How about saying, both of you go see a Marriage counselor. I've been working with marriages for 35 years, it's the same thing. Why not work on it together, communication is the beginning. How was he/she was raised, what kind of life did they have, was love, cuddling, emotions feelings ever in their families? So many questions and so many answers. Some men have to little testosterone, just by taking a shot once a month can help, but that is up to your doctor after a good exam, for both of you. Maybe you can start out by saying. When was the last time have I had a physical exam, then ask if he would like to go and have one to? From their, you can work on doing something.

Just get the **** OUT of his life, RIGHT NOW!

Not many are just content. He could be having an emotional relationship with another women or even a man. If he has a medical condition, I do hope he will decide soon to get checked out. Just know that you should become your own success and find that which makes your world complete.

I'm a man, and I have the same home life. The wife and I have become roommates, even though she doesn't want to face up to the fact. When I brought it up, she said she didn't realize it, and wanted it to be different. In less than two weeks, we were back to the same routine, regardless of what I did.

I am exactly where you are, you can only push them so far before they say your just focusing to much on the sex. They just don't seem to get that we need the whole package, love, intimacy and the feeling of being desired . Keep you chin up and keep sharing your feeling here with us. It does help to have that one place where you can conect with someone who know how you feel. If you ever need to talk I'm here for you.

I think at this point, you must get him to go to a doctor and be checked out. Men when they reach middle age have huge egos and when they start slowing down refuse to face facts and to go to a doctor because they are afraid of what they might hear. It could be ED because of high blood pressure, or something very simple that could be remedied by the little blue pill. It could also be psychological but that can be dealt with too. If he refuses, I see no other way for you, but to leave him as you have to live your life and you are still young and in need of some passion in your life. Good luck.

Men! His behavior is SO typical of how guys sometimes behave in mid-life. They let their life become completely unbalanced and their wife suffers.



How are you doing? hugs...