I Think I'm Attracted To An Older Man

I am 36 yrs & an I lost my partner & fiancé of 14 yrs almost a year ago to a tragic accident. My fiancé was my age & I have never man that is older than me. But the past month or so I found myself attracted to a much older man- he is 21 yrs my senior. I work as a nurse in a clinic & this is where I met "James". He is so nice & always has something pleasant to say... We exchange "light" convo & he seems like he's interested in me but I think he feels that I will reject him. I'm starting over in my life & I want the companionship of a man who is settled & not into being the focus of all women's attention. I want to feel secure. I have a friend who is dating an older guy & she said its the best experience she has ever had with a man. And since she's been dating him, the drama & BS in her life is at an all time low. She is at peace & happy in her relationship & she contributes that to being in an relationship with an older man. Not to say that if I chose to date an older man, I'll expect to same but I'm open to new experiences- after losing someone I loved past the moon, I don't want to start over with someone & feeling like I'm going backwards. Let's face it, the men that I have encountered since my fiancé's death have been a disaster!!! They have been such a turn-off with their games, lies, & drama. I don't have time for their foolishness- I need seriousness in my life. I just want to know what would be the best way to let "James" know that I am interested?
Goldie76 Goldie76
36-40, F
6 Responses Jan 2, 2013

MY advice is to simply flirt with him...he will up till now assume you want someone your age, let him feel that he is sexy and attractive to you! Every man's desire is to have a younger woman, I am 59 and my wife 28...we get along like a house on fire, the sex is awesome, even though I have to seemingly work harder at it! Bottom line ....love is....age is nothing!

Any update on the situation?

As 'James' is nearly my age, I may be able to relate. Tell him that he makes you laugh, and to think as well. Ask him what he does to relax? Coffee, Bar, Sports etc? Perhaps linger a little with him? You could tell him you are fed up with men playing mind games? That's if you want to see if he responds. Or you could just ask him out before discharge? I thought it was us patients who fell for nurses?

Hey ...Gosh am going through the same thing & i completely understand what you feeling.
Heres what i have decided, i will ask him out for a drive & will subtly but directly tell him that i really like him & i want to date him. you can do the same if it suits you. Gud luck dear!

What happened?... how did the drive go?

Sorry, yes I was kidding. I hope you can make it work for you. Just ignore my last sentence.

Complement him. Tell him any girl would be lucky to have him. Smile. Encourage.
If all that doesn't work, offer him head in the parking garage at lunch.

I hope you're only kidding about the head in the parking garage- I'm his nurse & he is my patient... Like I stated in my post, I'm being serious- I want to go about this the right way. But thanks for your comment