Alcohol,pain Pills,& Crack....

My name is Kim & I'm married to an addict of alcohol pain pills & crack.This is my 2nd marriage.My first husband was addicted to pills & alcohol.I went from bad to worse.I've been with my husband for 10 (long) years.There's been far more bad than good.He's been in a coma twice & has had a stroke also & he's only 43.I care about him but I'm not in love with him & I haven't been for a long time.I've done everything in my power to help him,but he always goes back.My 3 kids have moved out over the past few years because of him,which has almost killed me.I have no family around me to help me.I feel so alone all of the time.I have to hide my money & the car keys all the time.The tension at my house is so thick.When other people are around I feel like I'm walking on needles & pins & I have to make excuses for how he acts.I've been to alanon meetings & he's been in treatment a few times.He's been arrested many of times.Nothing seems to work.I know that I need to help myself,but I have no way out & no place to go.I feel like I'm trapped in this horrible nightmare!This past weekend feel like I've hit bottom.My husband went after my 13 year old son & punched him in his face a bunch of times & then said he was just playing around.He busted open his lip & cut his eye.I had to pull him off of him & I freaked out on him.We ended up leaving for the night.My husband ended up getting arrested that night & doesn't even remember it.When he got out of jail,he got 2 pints & some crack.He ended up calling the police in the middle of the night because he thought people were looking in the window.I feel like I'm losing my mind.
yellowkim yellowkim
36-40, F
May 16, 2012