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Postpartum Struggles With An Aspie Husband.

It is not "new" that my husband has Aspbergers. He is very intelligent and high functioning and I have always been able to think of his "quarks" as just part of the whole picture that I love so much about him. However now more than ever his "quarks" are leaving me feeling hurt, frustrated, angry, resentful and very alone. We just celebrated the birth of our third child. A time of great joy and a flood of emotions for both of us. Rather than enjoying this time, and adjusting to the sleep deprivation with an on-board supportive spouse I was literally left alone in the hospital and came home to take care of not three but 4 kids (yes I am counting him). He has stated that he does not know how to take care of the new baby, is "more" sleep deprived than I, etc. the list goes on and on. I give him credit that he continues to seek therapy and help- but he has completely shut me off from his life, jumps to yelling at me and the kids for little things. life with him in the house is a constant balancing act of walking on egg shells. I am left feeling emotionally drained and would love tips and advise from other spouses of Aspies.
fox2be fox2be 31-35 1 Response Feb 18, 2012

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Take vacations away from him. A day a weekend. If you can't get a sitter, get a friend to go with you to manage kids. Just get out of the house every 3 or 4 days at least so you're away from he constant worries of "did I clean he floor well enough?" did junior leave the back door open?" and all that stupid little details that set aspires off. The most important thing you can do for yourself is cultivate a few friendships so you can always have someone to call when you feel you're about to bust. You have to get out regularly or the walls will start closing in. The aspie's world is just to small for a nuero typical, let alone a family of them. You have to build your own world outside of hisand jut allow his world to be a bubble in yours. It will not work the other way around.