Perfect In So Many Ways

When i was 16 i fell in love with my husband, he was 20 and at this age you can be in 2 separate worlds, one in high school, one in college, it is very difficult to keep a relationship under this circumstance alone. add this to the underlying feelings i always had about him needing to spread himself out (he is a very social person), and me needing to have him close to me (well, i was in love, and felt starved for his attention) needless to say the relationship was not yet strong enough to weather our raging youth and i, seeing that he needed to live his life, made the decision to let him go... we went our separate ways. I got married to someone else (a white man, who i divorced 5 years later) and he continued down a different road of destruction that would ultimately have him physically ill and in prison a few times.
it would be another 18 years before we connected again. i was a friend of his brother (who was one year older than me) and i saw his brother's profile on i decided to say hi. we had a nice conversation and caught up. the next day he told me he mentioed to (my husband) that he had talked with me and reported back to me that (my husband) had gotten so excited that he asked for my email address, which i gave with some trepidation as i was currently in a very bad relationship. after a couple emails, this beautiful black man called me and the conversation i had with him left me breathless. finally, after years of feeling alone and the true me un-noticed, it was so refreshing to just have someone LISTEN to me, and validate me. the me that i thought i'd lost. i was so light on my feet to finally find a male friend who i could really talk to, and that high lasted for several months!
OK so i get that this was his technique for woo-ing me, and i cant (and dont) expect this to always be the case in our marriage, but at the time it was words from a true friend that i needed to get out of the horrible relationship that i was in, and move on with my life and feel good about myself and being single.
needless to say, the friendship quickly escalated to romance and this relationship withstood a year and a half of long distance across several states. thank goodness for cell phones and texting! I flew to see him 4 times, he came to me one time and then a month later moved permanently. we were married a little over 2 months later. I was 6 weeks pregnant with our little girl, who is now 18 months old.
This man DOTES on me and our daughter. and the lovely part about it is that he lives to do it, he recieves pure joy out of seeing our happiness whenever he does things for us. He shows his undying love every day just by going to work and returning to us every evening and being happy to see us at the end of a busy day. he is the hardest working man i have ever known in my life. the little things are so huge to me, like the sweet emails and text messages, the meals he prepares, he takes care of our finances, and takes care of the baby when i'm tired or sick, he cleans up really nice in more than just keeping house (wink, wink) and rocks my world in the bedroom!!! All the things he does for my daughter and I, he does with a willing attitude and a smile on his face... I love him more than life and so proud to be his wife!

arvalentin822 arvalentin822
3 Responses Aug 2, 2010

I am with a black man as well and I know they can be the best men !!!!

Truly inspiring. So great to read this type of story. May your joy continue unabated forever! :-)

sounds like you've got a good one. good for you :)