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Oversexed and Enjoying It..

Folks this is just to say though one may be in a sex starved marriage I am here to tell all that it can be reversed. Here is my story. Sometime ago I posted my frustrations on EP and my compliant was my husband of 20 yrs chooses to look at **** books I had discovered them at different times in our home and maybe he stopped for a time or either he would keep them in his car unbeknownst to me..however I found a **** magazine in his car as of late and flew off the handle as I believed he had matured and gave up that mess. However I posted a thread that I was on the edge of having an affair out of being neglected , sexually as he was satisfying himself by ************ and totally ignored my needs. Well Last week I dressed up and put on some sexy thongs on and a short sexy skirt and a sleeveless shirt and took off and left him with the kids and said I am off and see them later...He asked me to buy some pet food and I told him I was not going shopping but to meet some one.. and I left..( I didn't meet anyone ) instead I stayed away from the house for 5 hours...Upon my return I blasted my favorite music on my Bose and stood in the mirror with just my sexy thongs doing my hair and enjoying myself..( I came back as though I was satisfied sexually elsewhere). My husband came into our bathroom and he looked at me questioningly....he said hi and I said hi and then when I came out the bathroom he asked me if I wanted to eat some food he brought home I said no thanks I had a bite to eat when I was out...I could see pain all over his face and the next day he had to work and I TX him asking him was he ready to talk about the ***** books I found, and how long would he continue to do Willy and the hand jive to himself ? He TX me back saying he was waiting for me...I called him up and asked him what was he waiting for me to do, and he says to give him sex..Hello...he was ************ and enjoying himself and now he was waiting for me..Well I told him of my intentions to commit adultery and if it were not for EP and their wonderful support I might have very well went thru with my plans...So I asked him how would he feel if I slept with some one else as he makes himself sexually content with jacking off and i was miserable in our sex life...He said he would have been real pissed had he found out that I was cheating and I told him welcome to my feelings about him ************....So Wednesday last week we had hot steamy sex and made love over and over to one another not once but three times that day and Thursday same deal we made love twice same with Friday we enjoyed touching each other as though we had just met and made love twice and then Sat and Sunday same deal and Monday we just had a quickie as we have kids, we locked our room and went at each other like two hounds in heat and each time I wore the sexy underwear for him and myself as I feel sexy in the undies and for all the months (4) we only had sex twice a month I just could not believe that a little tease would get me oversexed and tonight I am waiting for him to come from work and we made a deal that whenever he came in from work we going to go at it and share sex with each other..Talking to him about my needs and my temptations outside the marriage opened his eyes he mentioned to me he was not aware of how I felt..Talk to your spouses and maybe give them a tease and something to think about. 

lin3 lin3 41-45, F 8 Responses Jul 29, 2008

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I'm so happy things worked out for you! I'm in a sexless marriage and have tried EVERYTHING! Romance(dinners, dates, surprise flowers and cards, spur of the moment weekend getaways) I've tried the direct approach(getting in the shower with her, texting her and saying u and me tonight in our bed, kissing her long and sweet out of nowhere) I've tried sitting her down and just telling her how I miss sex with her. Just being totally honest with her. None of those work. In fact most of them lead to arguments. I ask her all the time if she'll maybe wear those sexy thongs she used too, or those thigh highs. Instead of being pleased that I still would get super turned on by seeing her in them, she takes it as an insult and gets angry! We've been together for 11 years, only married for 2. Ever since the wedding sex has dried up. I'm talking like maybe once a month. Then she gets angry if I look at **** and pleasure myself! I tell her all the time I'd much rather have sex with her than look at ****! But still, nothing. All the mention of sex does is start a fight with us. I'm so happy u took matters into your own hands and shook him out of it. Now I just wish she would

great story

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Sally, thanks for the web address for divorcebusters.com<br />
Excellent, I found the information to be very enriching, although I was not aware of so many great marriage saving sites..I was not too far off as far as working on our keeping our marriage healthy.....Thanks again EP has the best folks for a great critic and advise I take them all and choose which ones I need to grow.<br />
lin3

I Believe that if your spouse or partner is willing to listen and try to work on the changes needed in the relationship, then there is hope for a long marriage/partnership..I am keeping the communication going..I spoke to my husband last night as well as this morning and asked him does he believe that he has a ***** problem and he said no, the reason he bought the magazine,he says it was alot easier for him to just jack off rather than go through with asking me if I wanted sex he felt he much rather aviod asking as I have said no in the past..when he has woken me up at 3am and I stay home with the kids as they are homeschooled and being tired at the end of my day ( which really never seems to come to an end when I have to give up some sex in the wee hours). I now know that we have to meet in the middle and work this sex thing out. I mentioned to him that with a ***** magazine you can not experience touch and love and if he chose the book over our marriage then he will be alone and miserable when he is old and grey and I on the other hand will find someone who loves a womans body and enjoys sex. I asked him why does he need to always cause turmoil in our marriage can we not ( especially after 20yrs) mature and grow together happy and at peace? Is that so difficult, to be happy costs not a thing than create misery and pain going through a divorce.

Wish I could say I had the same happy ending. I wore the thongs regularly, bought body stockings, all sorts of sexy things, and bought for him, too. It was fun to act out, and we both loved it. Not sure why the Viagra stopped working, but he seems to have this mental block that it won't work, so why try and end up frustrated? Excuse me, but I am always frustrated!! I am happy to hear that things worked out for you.

This is a great story. I had sexual problems too with my husband but I read this great book, The Sex-Starved Marriage and he read it too. It has literally changed our lives. It helped him understand what I was feeling. I highly recommend this book as well as the author's ( I think her name is Michelle Weiner Davis) website....divorcebusting.com. It helped alot.<br />
Sally

Loved your story!!