I'm married but lonely. My husband has no interest in spending time with me or having any meaningful conversations
jacqueline3 jacqueline3
46-50, F
39 Responses Aug 30, 2014

I am in the same situation I feel rejected and on loved I work take care of the house and kids no appreciation or love I am just a roommate in his eyes and I don't know how to deal I think the worst is no sex

I'm sorry to hear that. That feels like my situation.

Top tip...make his interests yours....that way you will get to spend time with him...and rekindle your relationship. This has worked for so many couples. Loving him is'nt enough..you gotta love smart....

Hi Jacqueline same here u can keep in touch my name is john tel 9823221391

Did you try to make things better?

Counseling, if he's willing.

I can talk with you and giving the feeling that you are wanted

rouger that and love ur offer... meet me at the Tims across ur home, at 1230 sharp.

I lived with a man like that for 18yrs. I made the mistake of staying, and concentrating on my kids and work with what I had....I kept saying to myself "At least he's a good father" or "at least he's not abusive" "it could be worse" But things did not get better. Then out of the blue, he told me that he didn't love me anymore and wanted something different...more like someone different I found out. Talk to him, don't let it go on, and if he doesn't change, leave him now. My heart is broken, but it was my fault for letting it go on for so long and making excuses for his behavior.

You owe it to yourself to be happy. Either talk to him and see if he will change or maybe you just need to move on. Life is too short to be sad and miserable. Sending you hugsss.

I suggest counseling first.

thats messed up divorce his *** u deserve better

Life is too short dear to spend it with someone like that. If he won't agree to counseling, be strong and dump him. You don't really have a marriage so why stay?

I believe my marriage would be the same if I did not make conscious efforts to make it healthy... I HAVE to praise him truthfully and preferrably in front of him but to other people... men need our respect. I have to find out what makes him feel best physically and do it for him often. I try to keep things tidy and greet him cheerfully... If I do not learn to find enjoyment in my part of the marriage.. he responds negatively to his part. It always seems like I put more into the marriage than what I get out of it, but now Jon is at least a good husband. We cannot love with a selfish love. If I have any hope of him looking beyond my faults to love me... I must love him despite his faults and without (sometimes) receiving anything in return.

but did u rely on his salary? i ve heard that u asked him for$24000 last year. that is a big money considering his mega pay.

also u took the money and split with ur mistress

I was just like your husband. For years i drifted away emotionally from my wife. But recently i woke up and realized i was using all of my energy on the wrong things. I am making a daily effort to reconnect and rebuild our relationship.
I cant tell you what will work for you but i can tell you that there is hope. Take a little time to focus on you. Do some internal examination of what drives you apart and what makes you connect. It may take time but it is possible.
Good luck.

Ooohhh.. thats sad...
Wanna be frnds??

can i have quality time sharing my feelings with you..?

Well, I guess that sucks =(
I wish the strength for you on either fixing or dealing with it, or something else.

Mine us somewhat the same. Conversations are about everything and anything other than what goes on under our roof.
No goals, takes no responsibilty for her wrong doing. and thats the problem. Quick to point the finger. A conversation is a two way street. Its impossible To have one with someone thats only concerned about what is a problem or concern for them. "communication breakdown its always the same" led zep

You can talk to me darling

Sorry

don't sound like much of a life partner to me

Look up some meet up groups in your area of things that do interest you.

how long have you been married?

You need to sit him down and tell him exactly how you feel and explain if things dont change then you are leaving. He may not even realize what he has done. If he does and he is doing that to you then it is time to leave and move forward. None of it is easy. I am on the other side of a divorce and am very happy, but the process does suck.

Mine was just finalized on 8/27. I'm happy too! Congratulations.

Congratulations, I hope you find the happiness we all deserve.

I will be happy to talk with you

Hugs

who the hell is this perv.

if you need a friend drop me a line i will chat with you ..you can tell me whats on your mind and i promise to listen and never judge

Marriage sucks. Divorce him! !

I understand that feeling, the last few years of my marriage my husband barely talked to me, never wanted to spend time with me, and seemed checked out. I figured that one out once he left and while I was devestated for a while after I would rather be alone than with somebody who clearly did not give a ****.

See that is where I am right now, I am ready to walk out and leave everything. I am his 3rd wife and he is 17yrs older. I have everything and don't want for anything but his attention. He is a workaholic and we run 2 businesses together, have a son in 3rd yr of college and a 5yr old foster child. I feel like I'm going crazy

Wow I am so sorry would he try counseling or is that off the table?

Not sure if I believe in counseling or just don't want it. I've already decided that I am not going anywhere until my little one is reunited hopefully end of year or first of next year. I am just tired of all of it.

Is this the reason you are his 3 rd wife ???

Is what the reason?

His ' absence ' in his marriage .

I'm sure it is, but there is nothing I can do to change that. I worked with him all day and all night if that was what needed to be done. I have created a monster as I spoiled him so badly that he didn't have to do anything but concentrate on what he wanted or needed to do. Now I don't know how to reverse my mistakes. If I try to talk he gets defensive and tells me to stop whining so I don't say anything anymore

stop farting my ase

So what do you do to deal?

You were convenient to him , not really part of him . I'm sorry to hear that .
My mum ended up the same .
Waiting for the day that he would slow down and plug back into the family . Never happened . He had a midlife crisis , had an affair and ****** everything up for good .
Then he realised that mum was the one who kept him on track and he couldn't do it properly without her . Too late .

That's kinda how I see it, I'm sure there have been affairs in the earlier yrs and I'm just ready to go live me life alone as I know if I gave him told him I want out of the business I would not be able to live with him any more

Do what suits you .. He's been doing it all his life .

Kinda where I'm at but hands are tied until my little one goes back with family as I would not do anything to disrupt her. So I am kinda just biding time and trying to get everything in order as I won't take him to the cleaners like a lot women would. He has been good to me since we don't fight or argue

I wish you all the best for a wonderful future .

Thanks so much, so if you don't mind me I have to ask why are you here

I've been with my husband for almost 30 years . Married for 21 .
We have been through the sexless marriage stage . 10 is years of compounding external stress on our relationship . It early broke us . We are perfect together , but we got lost , especially me , in all the crap . We are stronger and more in love than ever , and spend as much time as we can wrapped in each other's bodies .
I'm here to balance out the SM stories . Not many of those get back what they lost .
If you choose the right one ... Make it right . Both partners need to want that .
Many people here think that all refusers are the same .. Nasty , vindictive , controlling monsters .
That is not the case .

My husband dropped our boys off to school this morning , on his way to the airport to fly out for work . It's a 2 hour drive .
20 minutes later he came back , to make love to me .. because he missed me already . Hope he doesn't miss his flight ! Lol
Did our SM stage damage our relationship .. Without a doubt . It also taught us to nurture it like no other .

14 More Responses

I am in the same boat been married 21 yrs and didn't even celebrate it he got home around 7:30 and was on the phone for another 15 min, boy was I upset:(. So if you want to talk just message me

add me darling

add me darling

Hi

Same here !!!mine is not even at home yet!! And when he is, he is just in his cell or to tired to talk or something!!!!! :(. :(

I'm in same boat- husband wants nothing to do with me- when we do talk it goes horribly. Trying to hang in there for kids

Same here

How long have you been married?

Your situation is more common than you might realize... You will meet many here who have a similar frustration. How long have you been married?

What's his problem,Jaqueline? Where does the fault lie?

HAHAHAHAAH

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