Am Partially Mentally Damaged Due To My Past

:P I have come from a pretty hard, damaging past, from all angles of abuse. It took me a long, very long time to get a hold of it, and control it and stop it from ruining my life and everything around it, years of therapy and what not. I do have scars and triggers from my past that I still try and contol....insecurities in my relationship with my husband, whether he will cheat on me, insecurity as me being a good GF, my own self confidence in a personal perspective I have to constantly watch, and build on. I always inferior to other women, I am not your average girl, so I feel weak around them most of the time. I hav certain trust issues with women. I have been scrwed over by them so much, relating to the past boyfriends I have had, they cheated on me, my best friend I grew up with cheated with him.......

:( So there is a lot of issues to work on. The biggest for me came when I met my husband. Never in my life had I trusted any man ever...grew up not trusting any of them and would not let anyone of them close to me ever, no one ever for that matter, always kept everyone t bay, and if anyone tried to cross the line and get close, I would push them away. When I met my husband, I fell in love with him right away, and he is the very first man I have ever trusted, and believe me, it has been a challenge in trusting him. Practely drove him nuts about my insecurities of cheating or leaving me, it took a long time to fully trust he will always be faithful to me, and now we are getting married soon, can't believe it. So there is damage from my past, but I fight it back all the time so it does not ruin my life and his, he is one awesome husband, true to his word.

deleted deleted
26-30
2 Responses Mar 2, 2010

Of course. The past haunts all thoughtful people, but it can bash into you like a speeding train when you have physiological problems to deal with.<br />
<br />
Now for the advice you didn't ask for: If you don't do the meds, make sure you exercise a lot and eat all that colon cleansing stuff Dr Oz recommends. (It only took a sharp surgeon on Oprah for us to believe what the back to nature guys were telling us thirty-five years ago.)

You sound pretty bright to me. Maybe the damage is largely emotional.