Tired Of Being The Fat Chick...I am 23 years old, about to be 24. I live in columbus ohio and I am 402lbs. I have been fat since puberty. I keep going up and up every year. My whole life has been a struggle to loose weight. I started my first diet at 10 years old and ever since it has been a roller coaster ride. I am addicted to food especially fast food. I am also addicted to pop. I can eat a whole large pizza and drink a whole 2 liter of pop within an hour. I feel disapointed in myself. I feel like my parents are embarressed of my weight. I have a boyfriend that I have had over 7 years. He and I have been trying to have a baby for the past 2 years. We got pregnant once only to have it end in a miscarriage. It has taken over a year for me to be ready to try again. Losing the baby that I had been trying so hard for has literally devasted me. I was 360 when I got pregnant and since losing it I have ballooned back up to 400. I eat to feel better. I eat to cover up my feelings of sadness. I sleep my days away because of all the carbs. I work at a nursing home and even the old people comment on my weight. I feel like my life is just being wasted. At 23 I can't do the things a normal 23 year old does. I cant ride rides at the fair or at an amusement park. I cant fly on an airplane. I cant walk around downtown without getting winded. I cant go shopping because i feel like the store owners know I am not shopping for me. I feel embarressed going out to eat because I am always terrified I will not fit in the chair or the chair will buckle underneith me. Even doctors judge me. All i want in the world is to have a baby with my boyfriend and I am keeping myself from doing that. I eat and eat because i am depressed cause I cant have a baby but at the same time I am no longer having a period because of my weight. I am just tired of being the fat chick. I wanna lose weight so I can start living my life. I wanna have a baby and enjoy my 20's. I want to be able to do normal activities without worry or fear and I want to be able to buy cute clothes at normal stores.
Jill1806 22-25 4 Responses 1 Apr 15, 2011