Big And Beautiful?

Hello everyone. My weight now is the highest it's ever been.

I am at an explosive 336 lbs. Everyday is just a struggle to wake up.

From the time I wake up I'm tired again. My knees scream in agony as I take the

first steps out of my bed. I look in the mirror and see a morbidly obese woman. I try my hardest

to see myself as a beautiful morbidly obese woman, but it's so difficult to use those words all in

the same sentence. Getting motivated in the morning is so discouraging. I hardly ever

wear makeup because I always ask myself "what's the point?" I usually just end up

wearing a pair of sweatpants and a large sweater in an attempt to hide my hideous body.

I go to work and stand listlessly behind the counter as I scan the customer's purchases and

place them into their bag. I come home in the evening to an empty house and wait for a

friend to call, but usually just end up falling asleep in the chair watching late night television

shows and a half eaten tub of melted Ben and Jerry's in my lap. My snoring wake me up

and I drag myself to bed where I lay down...alone...and uncomfortably roll around for an hour or

two before falling asleep only to wake up in the morning to repeat the entire process over again.

Dabreesha Dabreesha
4 Responses Dec 13, 2009

Honey, my only advice would be to consider maybe letting go of the struggle. Just because you're a fat person doesn't mean you're not a person. Yes, we like food lol. BFD. And that means we're fat. Is it easier being fat? No. But if its who you are then make the most of it, eat for fun again, wear make-up, be pretty, and LIVE. Contrary to what diet ads say, we can be fat and have a life too!

Hi, I can relate to your story and I am now at my highest weight at 338. I am 25 and would love to start a support group and loose weight together. We are still young and we need to enjoy life. If you need anyone to talk to let me know.

hey. you sound depressed to be honest. I am not a pyschiatrist, and like you i've had some blue times with my weight, but if it's like that for you day after day that's not good. Is there a community counselling service you could approach as well as this forum? take care.

If you need someone to talk to, I'm here. 22 years old and 305 pounds. I also need help.