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Sexual Mismatch

It is hard, being a woman and having to deal with a very strong sex drive.  I feel unwanted and unattractive to my husband because he looks at me with that "not again already" look when I want to have sex, which is often.  He never has to go beyond his comfort level for sex because I want it so often, he never goes without it.  But I spend much of time frustrated because I do not get sex as often as I need, much less want.  By the third day of going without, I begin getting frustrated and crabby because I am feeling that urge and desire.  I need sex a minimum of every other day to feel content.  And this is just talking about frequency,  I haven't even touched the surface on the variety and more kinky forms of sex I desire that he thinks is "wierd".  He likes straight vanilla sex, I enjoy a more spicy sex life.  I just hate the way I feel being mismatched sexually, unwanted, unappreciated, and undesirable.
LadyKatherine LadyKatherine 36-40 11 Responses Feb 9, 2008

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Well hang in there u r not alone. I'm a certified nympho so I'm told try other things to help your self. Ask your husband to be open minded about maybe a ********* or get another girl. My wife and I r married for 12 yrs and counting. We r in love eachother deeply and we understand our needs but she can not keep up with me. So she let's me ********** or she joins in. Ask him to do that instead of sex maybe change will spice things up and see things different. Maybe a ***** would be good as well pleasure youe self with out him around so u have time to really get off. I also ********** about two or three timesa day to control my urges. She does not mind this. We ralso looking into swinging but that needs to be with the right people. So like I said u r not alone. I wish I can forfill my needs and my kinky side well that's another story by it self being BI and kinky and a nynpho what a combo right my wife is also ok with it. And is willing to help me so communicate with him or it will get worse for u. Do whayt makes u feel good alone or with your husband. Hope to hear if my story helps u. Good luck

wish i could meet you. we would have a great sex life together. my ex treated me like some kind of freak of nature because i just couldn't ever get enough sex.

I feel sad to read these stories and to think some of these are taking place in long term relationships . and to read that the neglected partner does not want to go outside to pleasured .it seems selfish too me how the other half can be so neglectful

I have the same problem, well almost. I have a high sex drive, and my boyfriend his is normal for a guy and he can not keep up with what I need in that category hes willing to try new things and all but not to much in a week. : (<br />
We are trying to work some things out to help us get to some common ground on this but its so hard for me to have this little like I am now. It gets upsetting, and I start to think hes not attracted to me, I know hes not but with this serious lack of sex "in my eyes" It makes day to day life a bit frustrating sometimes. I also cant "relieve my self" It just dose not work I need him to relieve it. I hope you guys figure something out.

i've managed to find an outlet with online cams, where my Wife accepts that i'll pleaure myself openly. She's not happy, but She accepts.

my partner and I are similar (although the roles are reversed). It seems that many of my friends experience similar disparities of sex drive with their partner.<br />
I completely understand the comment about "unwanted and unattractive". I can't but feel rejected in she is not keen.<br />
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I am yet to find anything that really helps, although talking to her about it does help a little. Sometimes the more I try to make things better, the more it upsets me (and nothing changes anyway). <br />
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I guess if different sexual appetite is all that is not great in our relationship, then things are pretty good. At least I can go find some quiet time for myself...sure, it is not AS good, but it beats having nothing (and keeps me less moody)!

HI.ME AND MY HUSBAND HAVE THE SAME PROBLEM JUST THE OTHER WAY ROUND HES THE ONE THATS HIGHLY SEXED,IM HAPPY TO SEE THAT OTHER COUPLES HAVE THE SAME PROBLEM,I WAS STARTING TO THINk WE WHER THE ONLY ONES.

Find an on line playmate and please yourself as you desire. Paltalk works well. I'm in a mismatch as well

Yup, Iget very very ***** if I don't get to have sex! Wouldn't you think my husband would have notcided this...duh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<br />
Hum, she is happy all day if I ****** her, she is very happy if I ****** her twice.<br />
Hum, she is very ***** because I haven't ****** her in a week!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sex is important...better find a happy medium.

Well, I think that you should find a lover or if you do not want to go behind your husband's back confront him about the problem of you wanting much more than him (maybe he would be open to sharing you?). After all, mostly it is the opposite way around - the males wanting much more than the females and a woman like you should not be hidden behind closed doors, since there would be such a demand for a person like you out there!