I'm not entirely sure how I feel about this topic, to be honest. I do try to stay upbeat and positive all the time, but due to marital stresses I've been finding myself sinking lower and lower into depression. It's been getting harder for me to try and stay positive. It's absolutely impossible for me to talk about my former abusive relationship with my husband because frankly he just doesn't get it and somehow thinks I should just "get over it". I was in that abusive relationship for more than twice as long as I've even been married; I can't understand how he'd possibly think something like that is just going to go away!

I was talking to my one close guy friend yesterday about some inane topic, and we ended up coming to the conclusion that because of it my opinions and feelings about men are basically screwed forever. In my entire life, I've only ever met one guy that is genuine, caring, open, honest, and communicative. 99.9% of men just act nice because they want in your pants. I even decided to go to a popular penpal site to try and gain some new friends, and I've already had to block god knows how many men. They send messages saying "You're beautiful, so pretty, blah blah blah". I just delete those ones. I even had some jerk ask me if I was happy in my marriage! Men have zero respect whatsoever, and I'm at the point in my life where I just doubt that I'll ever find one that isn't seeking their own interests in the end. The better majority of the time their interests revolve around their groin.

I don't know. I just...I don't know if I'll ever come to see men as anything other than complete dirtbags. Seven years of my life were wasted with one of those kinds, and I don't know if I'm ever going to get past it. Ugh.
Trinea Trinea
3 Responses Jul 13, 2010

That is the whole point. Even if he is a needle in a haystack (at least there is one..sigh)<br />
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Thanks a lot for your kind comments. Of course, there's a good deal more to why I don't trust men. I just felt that my post was getting rather on the long side. I'm trying not to remain hopeful for fear of disappointment in the future, but the one good male friend I have (whom I trust implicitly) tries to tell me the reverse. Maybe some day I'll end up finding a guy just like him, but I can't imagine that somebody like him isn't anything less than a needle in a haystack.

Quite a letter even if it is coming from the heart. I can relate somewhat but my issues with men are more about their lack of emotional commitment than about an issue with the groin area.<br />
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Do not allow one a hole to ruin it for you forever. Abuse comes in all forms.<br />
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Personally, I find that if you look a little closer that the abusers are acting out what they were taught and don't know how to unravel their actions without professional help.<br />
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Whatever the case, I wish you well. Don't give up on finding a good man. God Bless.