In A Dream Or Nightmare...

I too have just recently separated from my wife we have been together for 15yrs married 10. This is the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. We have 3 children together 6, 4 & 2 whom I miss very much.

The journey up until now has been mixed, I had moved out previously for a few months and we were seeing a councillor to try and help us with our issues. At first I did dismiss this type of arrangement as I thought we could work through it ourselves but I was wrong. Things got better for a while then we slipped back in to our old routines again. This made me depressed and found it hard to motivate myself.

I provide for my family so my wife can stay at home and help raise the children plus this is what she wanted. But of late all she seemed to do was pick at me for the things that I didn't do and was never happy. I must admit I wasn't the quickest to do things around the house but they were always done. I'd take my eldest to school 3 times a week and pick up my middle up from kindy 1 - 2 times a week to help out.

My wife, gets to go the gym 4 - 6 times a week I would come home early on tuesdays from work just so she could go to a class plus she would go on the weekends and I would stay home and mind the children and yet she still was never happy always something that I didn't do. Over the past few months she just started baiting me so we could have a fight then she would threaten to kick me out because I was too difficult. For example I tried to go to the gym twice a week then one day she tells me that she is now starting up running on the night I'm meant to have my time and because I didn't agree with her she told me I was to difficult and told me that I should start going in the mornings instead. If you are a couple shouldn't you consider your partner first and discuss these things...This is one of many small things but as they say 'it's the straw that broke the camels back"

I've been living for months on egg shells. if I didn't agree with her then there were threats of kicking me are you supposed to live like that? My children are the world to me and coming from a divorced family I feel that my children shouldn't have to go through the same childhood I did (which wasn't bad but you miss not having a stable family).

This is only a glimpse into my situation but being away from my family is leaving me empty inside. The fact that you do not see them in the morning or read them a book at night before bed tares me apart. I wake up empty everyday, can't focus at work, all I want to do is try and fix this but she doesn't seem to interested in working this out. Now I'm thinking that she may have meet someone new which has started her new interest in the gym and the constant picking at me to make us fight just so she would get me to leave.

I know they say that you shouldn't go back just for the children but when ever I have them all they want to do is stay with me and ask me when am I coming home.

I'm lost, not sure what to do - do you try and fight for your children and mend a marriage that is going through rough times???Sure it happens in every relationship but isn't it better to try and work together and rekindle what you both once had - Love!

InLimbo88 InLimbo88
36-40, M
Sep 21, 2012