I Didn't Want Him to Leave, Just to Love Me
I know this is going to come off as "needy" or emotionally troubled, and maybe I am, but when my husband of 10 years left 3 weeks ago after a minor disagreement (not even a fight!) and didn't call of take my calls for two days, I was devastated. I think that's what he wanted, but it wasn't only me I was upset for, it was our 3 kids. They didn't ask for this, and they are too young to understand it. (except for my 15 yr old, who saw it coming) We had issues in the marriage, for sure, and tried to work them out- atleast I did- so the fact that he would just turn his back on me the minute he doesn't agree with something, rather than TRY to work it out, blows my mind.
It's a sad realization to come to that you were the only one in the marriage who was in real love, the only one who was committed to it for better or for worse, and the only one who can admit that there are changes that can be made to oneself in order to breathe some life into the marriage. I am starting now to see that there is no way this marriage is going to survive if I continue to be the only one willing to try. It's scary, and it's very lonely, but I have no choice but to make it through what will ultimately be my second divorce before I turn 40.
I find it hard to think positively tonight, sorry.