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I Am Newly Single

It'S.....Complicated

By: uncontrollable
Written on January 31st, 2013
My boyfriend well ex boyfriend and I just broke up at the end of december....we had been dating for about 4 years. Our biggest issue was that we were both too jealous. .. well he was jealous I just didnt trust him worth a damn. The trust issues started about a year or so into the relationship. He had just got new job and started fighting with me a lot. I was confused with his quick attitude change.... we broke up a few weeks later. And to my surprise it was because he was trying to get with a coworker. I could help but laugh in his face when she turned him down. But of course me being sooooo in love and stupid took him back a few weeks later... but then another year or so went by and my friend called me and said hey your still dating your bf right? I said yeahhhh why???? Apparently he messaged her on facebook saying how beautiful she was and how much he wanted to be with her..... his response... I didnt know you were friends. But of course its a vicious cycle and I took him back....again. WEll a few weeks ago we were lying in bed and he wss texting. I simply asked oh what are doing? That was it.... he flipped out and said im so controlling. Meanwhile im just sitting there like wtf is happening... he gets up and leaves. I called him and txted him. Hours went by and it wss now 530 am before I heard anything from him. He texted me saying its over and all this ****. So I agreed. But then he came over last week.... we hooked up. It was the best I have ever had. But we dont want to be with each other... I still have a lot of feelings for him so I cant stop thinking about it. The worst part is I recently lost 85 lbs and it took a lot of hard work.... but these past two weeks I gained 12 in two weeks.... I just hate how much this is affecting me... I need advice and help!!!
By: uncontrollable
Age: 18-21 , Female
186 people have read this story

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9 responses
  • Misochan
    Misochan

    My wife of five years just left me and while we were together I lost 100lbs and still have more to go. I think of it two ways one I'm gonna lose the rest of that weight (or keep it off) to spite her. To show her how she is the one who is missing out. And I also look at it as I worked damn hard to lose that 100lbs no one person is going to derail me.

    You are a young attractive woman. You keep doing what you did to lose that 85lbs. Focus on that instead of him. You'll have slip ups but stay determined.

    Feb 15
    1 like
  • devonlad
    devonlad

    My wife has never trusted me. To be honest it will end up pushing me away

    Feb 4
    1 like
  • mario3hero
    mario3hero

    You're young and lovely. That means you are going to attract all kinds of guys ... Good and bad. It's your challenge (or pleasure, depending on how you look at it) to weed through and figure out how to tell them apart. And there's not anything to say he's a truly "bad" guy - Sometimes it's just not the right timing and circumstance.

    But I like to look on the bright side ... Being young and lovely, and having just lost weight .. Why not look forward to the thrill and adventure of spending time with new people? Yes your feelings for him are your feelings for him - Nothing new is likely to change that. But there is no reason you can't separate from it for a little while and learn to enjoy YOUR life for yourself. Being that sometimes it's not the right timing and circumstance, there's nothing to say that wouldn't change and there might be another episode with him down the road. But you shouldn't wait around for that - Not because it might not happen, but because you'd be denying yourself the experiences and fun you could have in the meantime. It's obvious HE wants to enjoy the experiences and fun right now - Maybe it's a big hint that you should do the same. Of course it's natural to have a little period of depression as you get used to this first, and you are probably in the middle of that. It'll be okay. In times of sadness it's helpful to focus on the smallest things in life that make you happy.

    For me when I have felt that way, even focusing on simple meals that I enjoy, warmer temperatures on certain days ... Watching a movie under a blanket or near a radiator .. Those simple feelings of content are the baby steps to getting past larger depressions. And once you're through .. The fun begins =) Good luck lovely.

    Feb 3
    2 likes
  • 0Mmiker
    0Mmiker

    This guy is a sex freak. He doesn't love you. He just wants sex. If you want to feel used then take him back. Otherwise, tell him and leave him to go fly a kite. But you and your body are better, much better, than that.

    Feb 3
    1 like
  • caliguy4u
    caliguy4u

    i wish i had a magic answer for you. you just need to be resolute and persevere. congrats on losing that weight. just keep focused. you will find someone worthy of you, maybe even soon. and then you will feel a lot better.

    Feb 2
    1 like
  • murrman1
    murrman1

    Enjoy life and realize that you'll probably be in several relationships before you find "the one". You'll find the right person that deserves you and wants and needs you. You'll know when it's right.

    Feb 2
    1 like
  • CraddleRobber
    CraddleRobber

    Jealousy is a negative emotion.

    Feb 1
    1 like
  • freezerboy
    freezerboy

    Enjoy being single and know that there are hundres of men that would be crazy about you

    Jan 31
    1 like