Who Cares?

I really would rather be alone anymore than with people that are only interested in using me.  I used to be the type of person who was so afraid of losing friends and needed so badly to be accepted that I would kiss people's ***** to get them to stay in my life. 


Now, I don't much care.  I am FINALLY starting to realize that I am a giving, loving person and if people don't respond to that, I don't need them.


This is not to say that I am totally self confident now.  I don't think I will ever be and deep inside, I will always long for the acceptance I feel I have never gotten.


But I am finally learning that it's ok to stand alone, sometimes even preferred. 

patchworkofmistakes patchworkofmistakes
26-30, F
1 Response Feb 6, 2010

You are so right! Its unhappiness for yourself if you have to nearly be the servant of another's ego just for them to accept and like or love you. Because you not only lose your self esteem, so important, but also your not you! So you essentially are receiving nothing worthwhile from the relationship!<br />
<br />
You cannot buy another's affection; neither with giving them your soul, expensive gifts nor outstanding sex! Either they want YOU or they don't. I had a friend who got trashed by a fellow she thought she bought by giving him her whole life and then he finally got bored, since she was not the type he valued, he trashed her heart and the little bit of self respect she had left, upon leaving!