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Can't Get What I Want

Ok, I am a regular, educated, classy woman.  I have been married, divorced, and have had two other

long term relaitonships.  I cannot get a man to take me seriously when I say,  " I want you to spank me," 

I wear sexy lingerie and am sweet and demure ... even bitchy at times, but I cannot not matter what I do

get a man to take me over his knee, pull off my panties, and make my *** red.  What gives and why> 


juliaclaire juliaclaire 51-55 56 Responses Feb 17, 2009

Your Response


You need to find a way to insert spanking into a conversation early on and see his reaction - something like "these kids today are so bad their mothers need to be spanked," or perhaps mention that someone you know got a spanking from her boyfriend and see what his reactions are. If he's at all interested you can find a way to get a spanking; if he isn't move on.

I think it is a shame you can't find someone to share your desire! I would oblige you in all respects!

Well, the key is, stop dating non dominant men.. The issue is woman have been around such vanilla men, that they have had to take care of so many things on their own, they tend to draw wimpy men due to the strength they project.

That give me "pause to consider". My current g/f is not really dominant (neither am I), but she has been on her own for a long time. Hmmmmmmmmm.

<p>I'd ***** you naked and then give you a spanking to remember, I wouldn't stop until your *** was bright red !</p>

If you ever come to France I will gladly spank you if you would then spank me ! I'd love to turn your little *** bright red !

most men have been with woman who assume spanking is foreplay, and for erotic play, not a true discipline session where sex is usually not a part of it. show him some pictures of a true red bottom and tell him you want that, and dont stop till you cry.

When I told my husband to spank me I got an erotic one. I didn't like it. He had said perhaps playfully that he would make my butt red. I said to him, "You lied to me". Perhaps implying he's a liar struck a nerve because he got painfully serious and I didn't protest, I just ended up begging him to stop. I like his more serious side. Lol. After that night I couldn't sit comfortably for days. I look forward to another.

I am in a long-term relationship, and she is afraid of spanking.
I would love to spank you. I would have you over my lap, and keep your panties on for a few whacks. I would use my bare hands. Of course, to indulge my own fetish, I would spread your cheeks, and play with your ******* while you had your panties on.
Then I would pull off your panties, presenting your butt I would spank you hard enough so it would sting my hands, and make your a.s.s. bright red. Love to see your butt quiver and shake. I would have your p.ussy right over my d.ic.k, and would push up against you.
That would be fun !

Go easy @ first then after a few sessions over your knee, start out easy and slowly get harder. Play Jacobs ladder. You pick a number between 10 and 50 start out with a light tap and each swat gets harder have her count the numbers when she is @ her pain threshold she needs to shout that number till she says the number in a quiet voice. She will learn to love it if you make love after wards. See I had a Hysteromcty and the only way I can get excited about sex is to have my butt spanked or read stories about it....

You have found the wrong men!!!! Hot and red is how I would leave you!!!

let your man check out all the sites you are on a show videos my husband found mine and after 26 years together I am now getting spanked and he is really enjoying it as am I

I'd be happy to spank you if you're around NJ. I've given spankings that ranged from love taps to where she couldn't sit down for s couple of days. Been a long time.

As a man in the reverse position as it were...for years I found it hard to find a woman who wanted to be spanked. then as I got older I got more interested in being punished myself. It took a good few years before my current wife could really get into it but she has learned to appreciate the chance to take out her frustrations by giving me a spanking and caning. I love it. Perserverance and mutual understanding seems to be the answer!

Next time you're in bed with a lover...

"Julie's been naughty" might get his attention..."Julie needs a spanking"...might get a response..!

Spanking is so intimate to the spankee. , When one feels the need for it, it is a shame that your need isn't met!!! Sorry again for not being closer....if your around Columbus, me

well were you closer I would love to help you out lol. Seriously, it all sounds very healthy and happy and sexy to me. Really. Who is to say what is right or wrong among adults? Think about it. Women are to act this way men this way. That is why we are all so darn happy, right? Wrong.
Just keep asking for what you want and eventually you will get it. :)

Never could understand why men won't help their wives when asked.

Perhaps in the days which I grew were to protect woman and the "Man code" was not to hit a woman which might carry over. While others feel the woman should grow up and not be treated as a child(don't agree)

I am a disciplinarian and have spanked women for 40 years. I must admit that many of the women I have worked with had the same problem but felt it needed to be done. So I can relate to your frustration.

Sounds great! In the past I have spanked some of my students,go for it.

I'm not sure how to take women who claim they can't get a guy to spank her. It seems easy... say "spank me".... it's a turn on. lol

If u told me I would not have a problem spanking u over my knee n make your butt red n hot wish u were here :) id spank that butt for u :) ty spnkbooty!

If u told me I would not have a problem spanking u over my knee n make your butt red n hot wish u were here :) id spank that butt for u :) ty spnkbooty!

I fully understand your needs. I am sure the right opportunities are actually out there. It's the quiet inidividuals who are more likely to accomodate your needs. The noisy one's do not offer any real action.

strange idea

I don't what people say if a girl wants a hard spanking then she shouldn't have to ask a second time she should be spanked as she deems necessary for herself and if I ever had a chance to spank you you won't be able say that you have never been spanked hard enough ever again

Well I do not know what to answer you maybe they are afraid to hurt you. But then again you know what you are asking for right you want someone to pull down your pants and underwear put you over there knee and spank you very very hard punishment style right they are not to stop until your bum is fire engine red. whether you cry or not that does not matter because some people can take a lot of pain right.

I am Nigerian. You should go to my country. You would have no shortage of men to whip you.

Id be more than happy to spank you. I find it hard to believe that <br />
you are having trouble finding a man for this.

My slipper still awaits, and I would like to be on the receiving end as well, though maybe not in the same session.

I am in Scottsdale Az and looking for a man who is a dominant not domineering. They all talk but no action. Do not want a maried man.

wow that a shame!I would love to give u a spanking cause I love giving a lady a good otk spanking :)

i would love to pull you across my knee, lift your skirt up and knickers down and smack your bare ***. would you smack my bare ***?

I would spank you lol. I would do it light to mediocre. If you want it hard, I would do that to. I am a man who is half your age.

I, too, have never met a man who would spank me, much less anything more erotic. I want to know how all you men meet women who want you to discipline them. I mean, what do you say to a woman you've just met? Let me teach you a thing or two about your behavior? I am an intelligent, independent woman outside, but behind closed doors I want to submit. Never found anyone who would let me though. Sigh....

I hear you! As a man old enough to remember when women knew that they probably needed a spanking every so often (at least), and knew that it was good for them, I think the modern approach which includes no discipline whatever for young people and especially for girls / women, has led to widespread unhappiness in the US. I think the men you are going out with have been emasculated and constantly shamed by feminism and progressiveism for their nature masculinity. Maybe you need to join a group or a club to find men who aren't afraid of showing this side of themselves. I certainly miss those days when young men counted on young women to set the standard for proper and respectable behavior toward females, and when young women counted on young men to put their foot down and give them the discipline they needed when they needed it (when the lights were on and when they were off...). Looks like it's all gone now and we have to get used to the p****y world we live in. Good luck and keep searching!

Here's a suggestion on how to get a spanking: Wait until something happens that upsets your partner. something that he (or she) is angry about. Like got a traffic ticket, for instance. Then you can say, "I bet you feel like smashing something." What ever he says to this, like, "Oh, I'd never do that..." say, "Give me a spanking, (instead of smashing something)", "It'll make you feel a lot better." Insist that you really want him to do it. Just an idea.

I think it's quite promising :) thank you

I know I'm coming nto this late in life but i can't ignor my cravings. I have had 3 failed marriages and I have to think if this had been part of my life we would have had a happy marriage. It's too late for me.

I know I'm coming nto this late in life but i can't ignor my cravings. I have had 3 failed marriages and I have to think if this had been part of my life we would have had a happy marriage. It's too late for me.

I know I'm coming nto this late in life but i can't ignor my cravings. I have had 3 failed marriages and I have to think if this had been part of my life we would have had a happy marriage. It's too late for me.

I have a nice slipper waiting for your bottom if you live in the area (NW).

put it in writting so there can be no tricks then i will spank you all you want no sex expected

Some men think it is a trap and that the woman will change her mind and call the police saying that he abused her. Some men don't listen to a woman when she says she wants to be spanked. Even with reading the responses posted by other men, it is obvious that they don't listen. <br />
I happen to like a good over the knee hand spanking. I get offers from men all the time to take me over a chair, couch, wooden horse and table for a cane, belt, whip, flogger. It is just crazy. It ****** me off. I am very clear on what I want and what I will tolerate. If men don't listen, I don't bother getting together with them. It is a waste of my time. I don't need to be bothered with someone who has a hearing or comprehension problem.

Maybe some men just aren't into it?

Julia,<br />
Where do you live? I have a hair brush that would love to spank that naughty derriere of yours. I guarantee that you will be very happy with my work which also includes "Aftercare"!

Julia,<br />
Where do you live? I have a hair brush that would love to spank that naughty derriere of yours. I guarantee that you will be very happy with my work which also includes "Aftercare"!

Would do it for you baby, and you would be sore, red, and excited; I promise you.

All these stories and advice given to you are now quite old as is your request. Or should i say desires and cravings.<br />
I am interested to know if you have been successful. Age is not a factor as one is never too old to go across someones knee for a good spanking, Sadly I lost a cyber space friend because of this activity that you are seeking.Ooops sorry I mean two. I dont know why it is looked upon as taboo when society openly embraces other activities that are more harmful. Is your craving for sexual gratification or you just desire some sort of strong discipline.Both go hand in hand in my opinion.<br />
<br />
I would be interested in your comments if you so

Xc,<br />
It makes sense to me!

Have you tried sitting them down and spelling it out for them? I like to barter ... I will spank you if you do any of these things ... e.g. if you flirt with a man in front of me I will spank you when we are alone - this way I enjoy seeing her flirt, she enjoys flirting and then she enjoys a spanking ... and I enjoy giving it so all's fair :)<br />
<br />
I like there to be a reason for a spanking rather than just "I want a spanking, spank me"

Why are some of you Ladies finding it so difficult to get someone to take your knickers down and smack your bottom? Spank Daddies are doing this all the time and I am one of them who is underemployed without fees.Just in case any still looking I am

Wish you were here!

Hallo Julia, Did your luck changed already?

Gigi, tel me more, but remember i want a better than just an otk spanking. Also,tell me more about the safe way!

I cannot imagine why you cannot get a good otk spanking. I would be more than happy to oblige. And in a very safe way.

Hi Julia, my simpathy. I have the same problem with woman. If they do it, it is half harted.<br />
It Tommy's advice does not work, men are not men anymore! Enjoy!

Continue to be classy but a bit sassy. Spill a bit of your drink in his lap then blame him for your clumsiness. Be wearing a short, flippy skirt over white, cotton panties with a full seat. Bend fully across his lap when you reach for the cloth that you are wanting to use clean off his pants. Make sure your skirt flips up to expose the seat of your panties. You will most likely get the first spank or spanks you want. Be prepared to reward those first spanks with a blow job and there will be more. Simple practical advice.

But not every man should have those kinds of experiences in their memory (BTW - thank you spunned for all that you have done for our country!). I can't imagine what it is, julia. There are some articles on about it - read them - maybe show the next guy what it says about spanking and why it is appealing to both sexes - I bet reading what they had to say in the article while you are sitting next to him in your sexy lingerie - I don't think he will be able to resist at least one little slap - LOL! I would think that most guys would be so happy and amazed that YOU want to do it as much as they do!

hmm, I'm speaking as someone who has done real violence towards people. (I've served in a few wars) anyways, for me, the idea of doing any violence against someone I love becomes revolting it, it connects in my mind with watching someone die of hypotensive shock on the dusty pavement in Kandahar and just ruins my sexual mood.