My Husband Loves His Job More Than MeI feel really alone most of the time. After so many years of supporting my husband in his career I have come to the realization that he loves his job more than he loves me. Even though he has said on numerous occasions that he only works so hard to make a good living so "I" am taken care of.
It seems hard for him to talk with me about our future or our home. However, he expresses himself more when talking about his job. He never lacks subject matter when he is talking about his 'projects and programs' at work.
He will leave a family get-to-gether to check on his projects at his jobsite. He will answer blackberry emails and calls even during "intimate" time between us telling me the calls are about his job. If it were another woman ithink I could understand all of this! But not his BOSS!!!
He will willingly travel for his job but hesitates when it comes to travelling with the family. There is no expense too big for his job but family money is always a complaint for him.
Perhaps I am too jealous, but when he will leave me or our daughter when we are ill to make sure someone at work is taken care of I get the feeling we just are not as important to him as his co-workers, projects or programs. Maybe I am paranoid or over reactive. I just think that when he expresses his job with the emotion he should have for his family that things are waaay out of prospective.
I would never put my profession before him. Even if it were the major source of our income, it could never be as important to me as he is. Perhaps I am the one out of perspective? Maybe I am asking too much? I don't think so.
How wonderful it would be to feel as important to him as his job is. To be as important as his "crew members" are to him would be fabulous. Once I thought I was the center of his world. The reason he came home at night. The arms that made him feel safe and loved. Now I only believe that I am the housekeep, the dishwasher, the laundress and occasionally, rarely, the one that gives him the sexual release he needs.
Is there an hope of a way to be important to him again?
peanutbrittle 46-50, F 9 Responses 1 May 28, 2010