This Is Soooo Me

I am terribly lacking in self confidence and i think it probably goes back to my childhood. I was brought up by parents who did nothing to instill confidence in me. My father is a very confident man. He believes he can do and get anything or anyone he wants, but he also tends to make people around him feel like they are inadequate. My mother is just the opposite she has always been seriouslly lacking in self confidence as well. So having grown up with one parent who pushed my confidence down and one who believed she was inadequate did nothing to improve my confidence. If anything i am actually worse than my mother.

I have seen several people say that confidence is a learned trait and i believe they are right. However i believe it is a trait that is learned fairly early on in childhood. I don't think it is possible for someone to suddenly become a confident person later in life. I just don't see how it could be possible to unlearn 43 years of learning. When one has experienced very little success over all of those years it is nearly impossible to gain confidence. The only way to gain confidence is to have some success in life.

Ok i'm done ranting now :-)

ihaveanameitsrick ihaveanameitsrick
46-50, M
22 Responses Feb 19, 2009

Hello again Rick I forgot to add that yes I too was a victim of negative talk from both parents and People, All I can add is what I'm now just Learning and that is to see yourself as GOD see's you and he Loves you no matter what you"ve done past present and future, He may be very Displesed with your actions and thoughts you may be entertaining if thier not GODLY thoughts, But He still Loves You!!! <br />
If you have not excepted CHRIST JESUS in your Life and been saved , I'd say that would be the 1st step toward real healing Bye for now bob

Hey rick,<br />
Sorry about your Professed Pain if real,but the take off clothes thing Had me wondering!!about sinceity that is,<br />
But if you were and that was a fleshly Freudian slip or whtaever then I'm sorry if it wasn"t well_____________if not wanting help or to help others Please go to a Dating site!!

i just ran across this story after so long lol. i guess other ladies were too shy to comment but you know you have your share of admirers, rick. as for the original topic, my mom did her best but it would have been nice to have a father that instilled confidence and whatever else in his kids. i believe that a better relationship with him would have went a long way in having better relationships with other males in my life. his failing to set a good example plays a big part in my views to this day.

still waiting

lol. be patient.

uh huh sure i will so far i have......1

oh, you have plenty of lady friends. you'll have all kinds of women wanting to join the club in no time.

yeah right just look at all the women who have commented so far.......uhm never mind LOL

ok, it's your club so you can be the only guy and you know many ladies would want to join just for you.

I wanna be the only guy!!!!! LOL ok i guess that won't work first of all i doubt i would get many ladies to join just for me LOL

lol. i know a few people that might be interested in that kind of club.

maybe we should start one like that too?? the EP Swingers Club LOL

now that's a club i haven't been a member of in a while lol

just remove your clothes and get in line......oops! wrong club LOL

where do i sign up? lol

welcome to the club "The Zero Club" a club for learning to fly again or for the first time!

in some areas, if i did have it, it's been so long that i've forgotten what it felt like. i feel like i'm starting at zero too.

in a way yes it is the same but you at least have an idea of what it takes to be confident where those of us who have never been terribly confident have no clue! for us trying to find confidence is like driving blindfolded we have no idea where we are going just hoping not to hurt anyone getting there

i don't know what's worse: not ever feeling confident or having had it but losing it. that's what happened to me in certain areas of my life. guess it's the same difference, huh?

i've accepted that i'm not a troll but i think calling me a "hottie" is pushing it a bit LOL<br />
<br />
but thanks and you are a beautiful sweetheart and don't YOU let anyone (not even yourself) tell you otherwise

honestly i got most of them by going through and adding pretty much everyone who was female LOL i have since got a lot of them because they know people who are in my circle. some may have actually liked something i wrote. i think a few ladies actually joined my circle because they heard about a certain picture LOL

LOL i answered this in the other story but i'll add that i think i am too old now to "find myself" that is something most people do in their late teens early 20's if i do it now people would say i was losing my mind LOL