My Husbands Best FriendMy husband has known this guy let's call him Red. They have been friends for a very long time. Right around 15 years. I have known him for almost 12 years(same as my husband). He has been a good friend for the most part. He is out sons god father. He was best man at our wedding. When is mother passed away he stayed with us. Since her passing he has come to our home every year for thanksgiving. The only complaint I have ever had is that when my husband is with him they always drink too much and stay out later than he originally says he will. Which is kind of minor. Anyway here I what happend.
Feb this year he calls and has a long talk with me after my husband left for work. Saying what good friends we had been and he wanted to repay my husband by surprising him! He wanted to redo the walls and flooring in our half bathroom. Since he wanted it to be a surprise he said he would want to do it a night my husband was working overnight.
May calls to see if he can measure the bathroom and look at a couple things. So I let him in at 2 am. My husband had only just left go work so the time seemed ok. PROBLEM he showed up with a bottle of wine and no tools! Barely looks at the bathroom and then just wanted to chat on the sofa. He started brining up my figure and how nice I looked. I kept returning the subject to his wife. Got him to go home and on his way out he went to give me a kiss which I ducked out of.
June-July he began texting just about every night. Some of it seemed like he needed marriage advice? He just got married last year. But the texts would take a turn and he would start talking about sex or being in the mood? So I would ignore the in appropriate texts. Always asking about his wife and trying to get him to think about her so he would stop. He confessed many marital concerns. I felt bad so I listened.
August he was texting and I wa ignoring him, he was vein inappropriate. He then texts me asking if my husband us ok and saying he is worried about him. Knowing my husband was supposed to be with him that night I was worried so I called. Nothing was really going on. My husband was drinkin and so was the friend. The friend says his wife was cheating on him with her ex. He asks if we can "have a good time!". I said I could never do that to my husband. He proceeds to tell me "even if he was already with someone else?". He stated that my husband had been with a ******** getting hand jobs for the last three years. That he could prove it he had heard my husband confess it! I fell completely appart and he just went with it.
So I confront my husband
He didn't seem upset at the confrontation. He just sat there angry and said he never said it. The next day we went out. At a barbecue another friend asks why I wasn't talking to "Red" I start to explain and my husband inturupts and says "remember the thing i said happend but it never did?!? I made it up! It was a joke!"
So that was suspiciouse. So I ask him again what is going on! At home by ourselves. Now he changes his story saying he wanted to test his friends, I didn't buy it, then it was a joke, then he said he wanted to create a legend? Then he didn't know why he said it but it was a lie. I had doubt so I said he needed to get an std test. I asked him if he wanted a divorce. He said no. He begged me not to leave. I'm having a very hard time understanding why he would tell such a lie? What would motivate someone to do that? And the stranger part? He still maintains a friendship with this guy? If he lied and basically tried to sleep with your wife and get you divorced im thinking a normal person would be pissed! If that were a girl friend of mine I wouldn't talk to her ever again. I consider that a friendship deal breaker! Am I wrong? I feel like I am missing a piece of this puzzle? What would you do. Where do I go from here? We have been messed up since this went down. I love my husband but I feel very insecure about trusting in him and I hate that.