Death Stands With Us All, Only When We Are Ready Will He Take Our Hands

Id never seen a dead body before, and of course there have been deaths in my family but so far they have been very distant relatives apart from my grandad who passed away when I was little. But I was to young to understand. 

A couple of weeks ago My partners Mum was found dead. Id never really experienced death before, but that night as we waited outside her flat and she was taken away in a body bag I felt death then...Very real, and in the air. I could see the people around me and see there hearts breaking. Feel the confusion, and anger and loss. And that's when I understood it all to well. 

Its incredibly hard to deal with Death, its hard to even think about it, to imagine how anyone can just stop existing, stop thinking, It hit me hard when I realised that my partner had lost his mum, and how he was very much alone after loosing so many family. But there's always an up side, in times like this family and friends come closer together, and even though its such a devastating thing to go through, part of us will heal, the lost one will always, always be missed and thought about, but being in this situation makes you want jump up and live as much as you can. 

I use to be scared of dying. Scared of the thought of being alone or forgotten, but then I thought of it this way. It might not be the end. There might be other places we go after we pass. I'm not a religious person so I'm not talking about Gods or heaven, but if that's what you believe, then you believe it no matter what anyone says. I like to think we have souls, and those souls stay alive even when the body is not. I like to think that our souls keep on going and journey on. 

Its been hard trying to organise a funeral at the age 19 and watching my partner struggle as well, but it wont last forever, we'll get through this and in time are souls will grow light again just like our smiles.

Blessed be.     Horo Shiro x

HoroShiro HoroShiro
18-21, F
Jun 4, 2012