Senior in high school and while I should be looking at colleges going out with friends I'm at home with my 1 month old son. And hanging out with friends is the least if my worries. For now I have support from my parents to finish school and attend college. But I'm so worried about what it means to have a baby and a huge responsibility. I don't even have a job I'm havering 2nd thoughts about the college I want to go to. I'm having second thoughts about the career I want to take. I wanted to be financially stable once I had my baby but at 18. I at this point don't have mental stability. I never pictures myself with a baby. I'm truly not where I want to be at this age. But don't get me wrong I love my baby. I just wouldn't have chose this life for myself.
Dianakr11 Dianakr11
22-25, F
4 Responses Aug 21, 2014

Nietzsche famously said, "Whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger." … What he failed to stress is that it almost kills you.
Odd things show up and creep into every corner of life: insatiable anxiety in places that used to bring you joy, detachment or frustration towards your closest companions, a presence of vulnerability.

There will be days when you feel like a quivering, cowardly shell of yourself, when despair yawns as a terrible chasm, when fear paralyzes any chance for pleasure. This is just a fight that has to be won, over and over and over again.

I'm here for you if you need anyone to talk to.

Where did u learn to write like that? Reminds me of my college boyfriend.

I'm assuming that's a compliment, so thank you. Mostly self-taught with supplements of creative writing classes here and there over the years.

Yes, a compliment. U must read a lot.

This sounds like obviously a big challenge for you but stay the course as you will get through it.

People usually choose a career AFTER they get to college. 😊

Don't think too much you'll make everything worse. I think you should attend college first, that's really important to help you get a job later. Ask your parents for another solution, go talk to them, maybe they have the best solution that you don't even believe they said it ;)