Walking ShadowThere's something much more real than I let myself be around others. A place hidden deep down where it's safe. Too bad the rest of me can't survive without oxygen. A candle hidden so well is bound to choke out.
I have only had glimpses of it's existence before, in simple things. When I can forget about myself, I feel the most aware. Sometimes like lightning it burns through black clouds. I wonder what it means, and wonder what I can do about it, but It leaves before I can understand the shapes revealed.
Why is joy such a mysterious concept for me, and yet so tied to simply being myself. Life yearns to be free and let loose in motion. It spirals and dances like leaves in the wind, while I remain bound by gravity.
At least in the process I learn. Most of all to not take myself so seriously. That is my mantra really. Though sometimes I fail at that, and end up becoming something I regret. Worse of all though is to stop moving at all. In between free falling and holding onto the ledge. It might kill me, but I'd rather go soaring through life than be stuck to the edge with white knuckles.