Many Masks

 I'm in eighth grade now, and I haven't been truly me since fifth. My friends ow don't know who I truly am. Sure, I really do love to read, but they know so little of the true me that it is frightening. In sixth grade The me I am on the outside changed completely, and the true me was shoved into a little box, that  only open when I'm alone, the true me has remained the same, while he outer me has worn many mask. I just want to be who i am, but if  did tat i would be back to having no friends, I I wouldn't be able to stand that

Spazz0209 Spazz0209
13-15, F
4 Responses Feb 28, 2009

Hey,<br />
I know it's been a while, but I just wanted to know how you're doing. I would say 'Are you feeling better yet?', but I know that there is never an instant cure for these feelings,<br />
-domitilla x

I am in 12th grade now and I don't honestly know if I ever knew who I was. <br />
<br />
People assume that what I show of me is what I am but I show what I usually want people to see. <br />
<br />
My adoptive family sees one thing and friends see another. <br />
<br />
Truth is how can they know me if I don't even know who I am. <br />
<br />
I know how you feel.<br />
<br />
And am here if you want to talk. Just send me a messege anytime!

thanks domitillaTLA

I really understand how you feel; I find it so, scarily easy to be the person that they expect me to be. To be the bubbly, happy-go-lucky, ditzy blonde who never seems to be anything different. Sometimes I just want it all to go away.<br />
I've been looking for a solution to these feelings for years, and unfortunately, I can only give you the cliched 'Just be yourself'. If you're scared that your friends will notice the difference, try to talk to them, they've probably been through exactly the same thing some time. If you're desperate, and really truly cannot talk to your friends, try being who you want to be, making the transition a bit subtle.<br />
Good luck, and message me if you ever want to talk.<br />
-domitilla x