I have been married for 30 years I was married very young We thought at the time we knew what love was. (doesnt everyone) . Ten years into the marriage I feel in love and had an affair with a married man. I felt so loved and in love. We broke it off and decided to stay with each of our spouses. A few months later we started to see each other again. Tried to go back to our spouses and again it worked out a while. A couple of years later we started again Only to decide again to go back to our spouses.. We then both have stayed in our marriages for all these years till recently we meet each other again and we both amazed at how our feelings after all these years were still there. Now six months later we are back to thinking we cannot hurt our spouses and we should stop seeing each other again. I have lived for all these years being in love with someone else I am not married too. I have tried so hard to be in love with my husband. I am a cheater and a lier and so is the man that I am in love with. Obviously we dont love each other enough to make the total committment to be together. I am sure if I ever had the courage to leave my husband I would never ever find the love that I miss so much and it scares me so much I stay in this marriage.