I am a walking contradiction.  I have so many personalities that I was thinking of naming them (haha).

I have a genius IQ yet I still haven't gotten my BA.  I graduated with honors from both high school and tech school and I only make $7/hr.  I have an AA in Cyber-Crime and Criminal Justice yet I work in a bakery.  I have naturally blonde hair but I dye it red and everyone falls for it.  I act so hard but I cry a lot.  I push people away but all I want is for people to love me.  Everyone thinks I'm loud but when I'm at home I sit quietly and do crafts.  People think I am the party girl but I only drink maybe once a week.  I get mad and yell instead of letting people know I'm hurting.  I love girly things but not too girly.  A lot of people get the impression that I'm impulsive but believe me, I've thought it over.  Sometimes I say shallow things to cover up that I'm pretty deep.  I can never express any emotion completely for fear of being vulnerable.  I come from a stereotypical family (mom, dad, and brother) but my mother has alcoholism, my dad has PTSD, and my brother is autistic.  The average engagement only lasts 6 months, I'm still waiting to get married after three years!  I hate my future sister-in-laws.  I have a kind-of sister who is pregnant for the third time.  I see my extended family once a month for birthdays and holidays!  I live in a house that's only half finished (laugh).  I was the most popular, unpopular kid in my high school... and even college!  I know my second and third cousins pretty well.  I claim to have absolutely no shame, but I just condition myself to never let anyone know that I'm blushing on the inside.  A lot of things I do are for the shock value, really.  But that doesn't include the piercings and tattoos.  Those are for me.

I think that about covers it.  If I come up with anything else, then I'll definitely add to it.

theophania theophania
22-25, F
6 Responses Jan 8, 2007

your comment really made me realise i have no idea who i am!!!. it really annoys me that everyone who surrounds me has a really simple life - how bad is that on me?<br />
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Honestly though , i have the most random bunch of friends and am i completly different side of me with each of them. Not a different person , no no no , im not fake , its just im me , and i have some very different personalities yano?<br />
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I have a best friend i grew up with as a child and when im with her we act like complete loud mouthed lil girls out for a drink like old times, and we dance and have no inhabitions and don't care about anything but the present with or without alchol, and before i met my boyfriend - we were very very into being the centre of attention with the lads. We talk very rarly about things that matter and are more into scraping the surface and chatting about lighthearted things. I dress like a sexy minx and act like one too... <br />
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Yet ..... when im with the same friends sister whom im also very close with - im changed , we have mature deep conversations and vibe off each others confidence, we cheer each other up and make plans for the future . We make sensible decisions about life and everything generally and i dress fashionable yet covered up. We take on the role of men hating women excluding my own of course , and and modern powerful women determained to take on the world.<br />
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Then.... I have a friend i used to live with , and when we get together , im a drama queen and allwayys find something that has annoyed me in the world which is cool cos she does too, we are attracted to trouble like you wouldnt believe and always make a night that should have been simple into a madness fest!! nether the less i love her and when it comes down to it , the crazyness distracts me from my stresses. When im with this friend i dress wacky yet expensivly. <br />
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My other friend is a mystery, When we were school kids she attracted some very dodgy men and was pretty much a chav.. yet i loved rebelling with her and out of everyone i could tell her everything !!. which goes completly against the me that is a nursery nurse and soon-to-be teacher . We got into looads of trouble and it was me and her against the world... now shes pregnant and has done a complete U turn, In turn with her being with child - i have also grown up , and have fallen into the role of being massivly maternal and mumsy and all that jazz.. prefering baby shopping and tv watching over a night on the town.<br />
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Noowww.. with my boyfriend ... I am the stragest of all , i battle with all my different beings daily and constantly suprise him with my reactions. ... I spend some days dressing in Jeans , T-shirt and my Cat Boots being a Tom-boy and play fighting with my man, Then , with no warning will ***** off , and become a fashion obsessed girlie girl - much to his distress - prefering my knee highs to my cats. I am emotional yet controlled. Smart yet sometimes act dumb. I am energetic and wild and yet can spend a day doing nothing. Im responsible and yet not. I never respond in the same way to a situation - ever. Im inpulsive yet plan things down to the last detail. Im a free spirt and yet want to fit in. Im confident and yet naturally worry about day to day things. Im loving and caring and yet will completly unrationally dislike someone. Im understanding yet sometimes dont get the things my boyfriend or friends think it seems alien to me.<br />
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All in all Im a very frustrating person to be around if your someone like my man, who is only really one person all the time.

well not being stereotypical is great!<br />
it only shows that we are humans.....ans we have sooo many aspects to selves that we know and do not know it yet....and if we dont know it yet then how can the PEOPLE know ???<br />
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i say who gives a crap about the people and wat they think?

How about a cup of camomile tea and some yoga:))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

my **** is a contradiction - it's really big, and it doesn't exist!<br />
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can i loaf all over your curtains?<br />
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thanx plz

Oh my God, we could be twins! I throw like a girl, but I punch like a guy. I love the fact that my biceps are big, but I also love the fact that I have a curvy waist and hips. I'll only watch chicks flicks when no one else is around, and even then I deny myself sometimes, but I would actually prefer gore and mayhem. I am hugely intelligent, have an opinion about everything, and love the way I think. There is no one I would rather spend more time with than me! I am blonde and a Gemini, whihc means that I am legally allowed to talk to myself, I guess, and though I would really love to take up a handicapped parking space, just once, I couldn't actually do it. I would love to save the world and make everything better, but most of the time I can't stand the human race. I'm still hoping for Prince Charming, but the reality is that I am OK with becoming the little old lady at the end of the street with all the cats. I say that true love doesn't exist, but I secretly hope it happens. I would love to look at myself naked and think awesome!, but I still haven't gotten there yet! Most people think I would do anything if dared, but I am too old for it now. I told a friend once that I became a call girl in London, but it was a lie because I was trying to "one-up" her because she became a ********. But to think that I actually had the balls to do that just goes to show that she had no idea who or what I was capable of. She was supposed to be my best friend! Of course she also set me up on a blind date with a guy that A) was so white I could see through him, B) was a bit of a drug addict, C) had enough tattoos to be a pirate and D) had a snaggle tooth! Needless to say "*****" and we aren't friends anymore. But you'd think your best friend woukld at least set you up with someone you'd be attracted to and at least mildly compatable with, right?

well you are certainly not boring.i only have boring parents and greatparents,no one ill or dying,in the army mental illness around,(poor qualifications),well thats down to me,sorry got the thingys mixed up have to colur my blasted mousy hair to get it to look anything murders,affairs,crimes,tusanamis,cyclones.troubles or anything.good luck there.