Weird? Anti-social? Out There Somewhere?

As long as I can remember, I have never fit anywhere.  In High school I was popular with all "Clicks" ie: class Pres. & Decent student, dated 'doper', Cop's daughter, Jock's Sister, and friends with most everyone but no one knew me then and no one knows me now. 

While trying to save my second marriage (15 yrs ago), I went to a psychotherapist who told me I became what people wanted me to be.  Unfortunately that still holds true today, but I'm working on it.

At sixteen, I decided that when I grow up I wanted to be a hermit.  Still working on that too. 

But in spite of it all, my life is alright.  After an abusive marriage and then a trophy wife for another 9 years, and after 10 years alone raising my two children I have met and married a man that tries to understand me.

I am not religious but I am spiritual.  I follow the Native American path even though I'm Dakota, Swedish, and French Canadian with a little Scottish and Cherokee in there somewhere.  I believe in One Creator, natural medicines and Karma!

I have two books published and working on two others. 

I dream of seeing the 'Northern Lights' which if all goes well I will be spending my summer there.  Then on to meet my husband in South Dakota for Sundance.

I'm older now and trying to learn who I am.  Not how I'm defined by myself and others, but who I really am.       And ya know what?  It's not easy!

MtnDawn MtnDawn
46-50, F
2 Responses Mar 15, 2009

Being popular made every one expect more from me. I was never allowed to have a bad day or spend time alone. <br />
You have to be happy. as 'they' say...<br />
Life is too short.

I was never popular in any clique but I always tried to live up to my friends standards..Maybe it's time I make my own standards..And 2 books published..Bravo to you!!