And I Feel Sort Of Guilty About That

i am half pakistany, half mexican and i grew up in Orange County and though i am against group allegiance in issues of thought, you could say my value system aligns with the leftists. But one of my favorite books - which made a deep impact on my personal value system - is Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged. (she's not all right, but I have my reasons for loving her and i think they're beautiful.)

I am a professional in the Arts but I spend all my time lately studying neuroscience.

I look white, but obviously my blood is brown ;) so in high school i'd listen to people tell racist jokes and then tell them what my background is and watch them get self conscious.

i believe women and men should get equal pay for equal work and in general egalitarianism, but when i have kids i want to be able to stay at home and raise them till they're old enough for school (and somehow keep up my career) and expect men to hold doors open and feel protective of me.

in my daily life i love to dress professionally (the job requires it) and in general i dress up for parties n nights out with friends and they're always surprised to hear that i've had all these trippy hippy stories and reckless adventures in my past (and sometimes on the weekends. . ;) and i don't understand that because it's not like i'm any kind of wallflower. but then, often people's first impression of me is that i am shy and quiet (maybe because i am observant at first). and i end up sometimes feeling like am some kind of fraud for surprising people with my unexpected peices.

i have always loved studying religions, but i'm pretty sure i'm an athiest (or at least a 'practicing agnostic). I'll go to wild baptists churches, masques, and temples. anywhere to feel people letting go and trying to connect. but i do believe in thinking for myself and listening to the voice inside of me that rejects myth. (i've read the bible, but more like a work of literature . . ) my favorite thing to say is : Logic Prevails (often because i only get to say it when it does and i love . .when. . logic prevails :)

i have taught at the collegiate and high school level & because i look so young students mistake me for a classmate on the first day . .

grew up in an affluent community and went to small private schools for almost my entire life. the first time i went to pakistan i was six and when i came back i was conscious of how petty the value systems i was raised within are. i speak up when i can (though mostly i write up)

in high school i was a punk rocker (because of all those angsty lyrics n i used to write for a politically critical zine) but i still loved shopping and dressing up and eating good food at nice restaurants, so depending on the day of the week, my look altered. i was also into ska and dressing like a 50's housewife, go figure . . these days depending on what my responsibilities are for the day, i'll either look like a museum professional, a teacher or an undergrad. .

aye

navyas navyas
26-30, F
Feb 10, 2010