Feb 19, 2009

This is my second divorce to the same man.  The first one was Aug. 1, 2006....

The past three years have been pretty crazy.  In the end I am so much stronger than I realized I could be and know that I am better off without him in my life.  I watched him make the same mistakes repeatedly and never take accountability for his actions.  Everyone makes mistakes.  Usually people learn from them.  Going back to the same behavior shows addiction and the inability to be responsible or matue, especially when you are an adult.  By this time in life you should know fact from fiction and be able to discern right from wrong through sound judgment and principles, providing you have any.  Not being virtuous is the biggest problem, it only affects your quality of life.  He has no morals and that is not conducive with raising 3 Godly young men who will someday have families of their own.  It was my JOB and RESPONSIBILITY as a mother to give them every chance at success.  What I ALLOW in my life I am ALLOWING in their lives.  I will not have a man in my life who is not a God fearing man ALL THE TIME, not just when he decides to go to church.  Knowing I am showing my boys the difference and right way in life gives me satisfaction, DIVORCED OR NOT... 2 times, so you can see I tried to work it out.  But his lack of morals and "justification for his stupidity" were ever present.  To him women are just a "piece of ***"...he has told me that...all of them, so he can have all of the *** he wants.  I have the kids and I have the ability to fix alot of the damage that he caused. 

When he has the boys for 2 days and buys them stuff or takes them places do you think it really makes up for not even calling for 11 days straight because he is with some other piece he found.  Not at all.  And to find out that in those 2 days he cursed and yelled more than I do all month.  Insane that he gets to see them at all to be honest because they never want to go...

I am grateful to God that I am divorced from this man.  As his wife I was accountable, now I am relieved of that burden and no longer have to worry about his salvation.  I still pray for him, only because he needs his children's respect, needs to make some right decisions for a change. 


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4 Responses Feb 25, 2009

More power to you girl......my son was also better of without an unrighteous father.<br />
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My son now 17 , has refused outings with his dad for the past 8 years.....when his father called to collect him , my son would sneak out the back door and go to his friends house.<br />
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Now he doesn't even return his fathers phone calls......kids see through the presents and spoilling, don't underestimate your sons......you are giving them the right sort of life to raise healthy young men of the future.

I really do applaud you. I am divorced from my 4 children's father. The ironic thing is now him and the woman he left me for, are living with me. He married this lady in 2006 and it has been an eye opening experience for me.<BR><BR>From day one of our split, he told me he still loved me and always would. Now I have my two daughters and he has our two sons. His new wife and my sons have no place to live so I have opened my home to them.<BR><BR>I sometimes think I am crazy and other days it seems to work. The day my son ask me "what about Dad and her, where are they gonna live, my heart melted." I couldn't be that cruel. I just think that everything will work out for the best.<BR><BR>The strange thing is, I really had a lot of resentment for this woman and now my eyes are open to a lot of the things I never Knew. I am really glad that I am the bigger person and did what I had to do for my kids.<BR><BR>I think as mothers, we have to do that. I think that if you felt it necessary to divorce him, then you are doing the right thing. We definitely have to set examples for our children. Congrats to you!

I applaud you. There are far too many selfish individuals, and you have shown your boys how to be selfless. You are a STRONG woman, with incredible moral fiber. "Whatever you wish for in life, that is what I wish for you".<br />
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good...you deserve better....