Betrayed By People I Love

I'm not the kind of girl who has boyfriends. I have a personality disorder and I'm not very attractive (honestly, I'm ugly). So when I had a boyfriend it was the best thing that ever happened to me. My dream came true.

I stayed with him through my first year of college and it was bad because he was the only thing I had. A little over a year ago he dumped me because I was suffering from severe mental illness and I didn't want to go on the path he wanted--which was to be a dealer.

He hurt me once by leaving me. My best friend started to hang out with him and lying to me about what she did. I felt more hurt by what she did than what my ex did to me.

I thought it was all over but my roommate, someone I thought of as a sister started buying her weed from them. In fact she had them coming into my house! It was very upsetting for me, and I started to become obsessed with my ex again. She is still buying from him, and it hurts me more than anything. I can't even tell people about this, or them because it's not my business to control people.

I just want to stop obsessing about this. I want to get over my ex and move on, fully. I want to find love again.
TeaAndCrumpets TeaAndCrumpets
18-21
1 Response Nov 28, 2012

I can relate to your post. We are all beautiful in some ways. Find those within yourself and do something each day to be kind to yourself. It takes time to heal. Find some activities to keep your mind occupied, and find good habits to take up alot of your time. When we are busy, we have less time to dwell or obsess on things...Good luck girl. i am right here with you...trying to follow my own advice : ),