He's Cheating On Me For The Couch.

I have been with my fiance for three years now, and while I always gathered he wasn't a neat freak, however recently his laziness is driving me away. He works hard, and I understand that. I work full time as well, in addition to having to raise my son. Before I met him I remember a life with just my son and myself, and a clean, happy place to retreat to after a hard day of work. Since being with him, I don't know how to explain it... but my home life has become unmanageable. Every chore goes neglected. EVERY single last one. From clothes, to dishes, making the bed. Even his own personal hygiene. EW. It's driving me bonkers. All he does is come home and lay on the couch. That's it. Nothing. He just lays there. Doesn't go anywhere, doesn't do anything. Doesn't bathe. He just sits and watches TV. ALL. DAY. LONG. Versus myself, on my days off I'm struggling to pick up messes strewn all over the living room where he lays, and the rest of my hell hole I call a house. So that on the nights I work it can revert back to the piles of CRAP he seems so fond of. I don't know what to do. When we are both off, I have to clean around his blessed couch. It really makes me bitter.
waleli waleli
22-25, F
2 Responses Sep 26, 2012

Wow that is me 100%! Single mother to 2 darlings before we met. After marriage everything is EXACTLY as you described from house hold chores to the stupid tv. He never talks to me which has led to depression and sleeping on the couch every night. I miss being a single mom!! His personal hygiene is also lacking 😁

I was in a relationship like this for four years so I know exactly what you're going through and how frustrating it can be.
Only difference is the last year he was unemployeed and is was still a giant mess. His thought was that if I wanted it clean, I needed to clean it. Except when his friends came over, than the place was a mess and why wasn't I keeping up with the house work?
What I did was basically once I had enough I came to him and simply stated that I was not happy. I told him exacty why I was unhappy and what we needed to do to fix it. It came down to he didn't want to help me, so he left. It was very hard and I cried for a good week or so, but I'm so much happier now, and a lot less stressed because I can come home and not see a mountain of mountain dew cans stacked on my computer desk!
I wish the best for you. I hope if you talk to him he'll listen.