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Pansexual Discrimination...

Identifying as pansexual can be problematic in this society where there seems to be 'sides' and pressure to 'choose' one. In my dealings with the outside world, I have often felt it was just "easier" to identify as "gay" (not quite so life denying as identifying as lesbian) when in a relationship with someone who identifies as a bio female. And, also easier to identify as bisexual when engaged with bio men. But as such, I have always felt discriminated against by both heteros and gay/lesbian because I fit in on neither side. refusing to take a side. I've encountered many ;lesbians who find bisexualism and pansexualism so threatening that they would not date a person based solely on that. Meaning, they say "I would never date a bisexual, never." They have no concept of how oppressive their line of thinking is. Their internalized fears of "not being enough" for the bisexual (or the pansexual for that matter) spills over into assumptions and biases that feeds off this stereotype that we are a people who are sex addicts or who have appetites for sex so insatiable that we would essential screw anyone or anything. 
So, is it really "easier" to accept these labels of gay or queer or bi, when we arent... we are pan... is it easier to let society go on with their assumptions and stereotypes then to fully embrace who we are and announce it to the world. Explain it, Educate people. Work on breaking down these barriers and stereotypes. Work on changing the attitudes of our allies first (the gay and lesbian community)... let them see that we dont have to "choose one" choose to be gay or to be straight... or to be bi. Because as pansexuals we have chosen already - we have chosen to see people for what is in their hearts and brains, not for whats between their legs. 
collide25 collide25 26-30, F 5 Responses Jan 24, 2011

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My boyfriend Johnna acted similarly when our relationship began. He was very insecure. He had never been in a real relationship before and he was sure nobody wanted to be with people of his gender (Inter-sexed). After maybe a month he realized I wasn't going anywhere and he stopped asking if I thought so-and-so looked good. I think most of the problem is insecurity.

omg........you said it perfectly, to be bi or trans, everyone assumes you are some sex crazed person..........when we have the same needs and desires as anyone else............hugs

omg........you said it perfectly, to be bi or trans, everyone assumes you are some sex crazed person..........when we have the same needs and desires as anyone else............hugs

... Such a huge issue that I'm going through it with my girlfriend. The good old "pick a side debate". I say educate. They'll understand eventually. After all, for some who grow up understanding only one thing only to have that thrown out, it can be difficult to acclimate.

YOU hit it on the head,guys think i am funny because I get along with mostley gals.Gals don't seem to think as much with there vagina as guy do with there "little" head