I Love People But They Terrify Me.

I love being with people. I love socializing. I love going to parties and I love making friends.

It's always the day after I do something outgoing that i freak out. a friend and i will hang out, the next day i wonder if they like me anymore or if they were taking pity on me. the absolute worst is when i'm seeing someone. i am in CONSTANT FEAR of break up. i will reassure myself and tell myself that the guy likes me, there are no signs whatsoever from him that would entail that he wants to break up, yet i am always frightened that he will be over me the day after a date, scared that i did something that scared him off.


and then of course we break up. but it isn't the break up that's the end of the world for me so much as this horrible feeling of failing.


i'm losing my mind.

instantiations instantiations
18-21, F
1 Response Oct 27, 2008

you've just answered ur question--it's not the break-up that bothers you; it's the fear of failing that bothers you. and you hate it so much that you would rather the relationship end then feel that gnawing grip of looming failure.<br />
<br />
hats off to you tho--i wish i had your guts. i have extreme fear of failure also--but generally avoid becoming close to people to keep that demon down. you, however, plunk yourself right into active socializing--your demons be damned (at least until later)!! GOOD FOR YOU!! keep at it---u r well on ur way!!