My Mother Is Driving Me Crazy

She is paying for pretty much the whole thing, but I don't think that gives her the right to ruin my special day. I'm getting married in three days. Back in march we decided on a guest list. I invited about 20 family members, FI invited 20 family members and we each picked 5 friends and 2 attendants. About 3 days ago we were finalizing with the caterer and my mom said something about making sure we had enough food. The caterer asked how many guests and she told him 90! She has been inviting people to my wedding without telling me. Friends I haven't seen in 7-10 years "Oh but you were such good friends" IN JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL! I knew that she was planing a bbq in the backyard after the reception. I was under the impression that it would only be OOT guests and attendants. I got an email from a friend of mine (who was origionally on the list) that was asking who I wanted to invite. My mom friended my friends on facebook and asked them to invite people to the afterparty. I confronted my mom and I told her that I thought it was very tacky to invite people to the after party and not the wedding. She told me, "Oh they are invited to the wedding, I bought some more invitations and printing the wording you picked out on them and have sent them out. Did you not want me to do that?" NO I DIDNT. I wanted a small, intimate wedding where my groom's family could get to know my family since they live in a different state. My future MIL thinks that there are going to be the same amount of people on both sides, when she shows up and there are twice as many people as we told her she is going to freak out! I have some really cute, sweet ideas for the wedding but when I tell my mom, she purses her lips and says "That's interesting, but this is what were going to do." This is not my wedding, it's hers. I dont even want to get married if things keep going down hill. I want to put it off and not tell her about it until two days before so she cant ruin it again. But I feel bad bc she took out a loan to pay for the wedding. I told her I wanted to get married in the park, with like 40 guests. We compromised and I'm getting married in the church she got married in. My FI is an atheist and is very uncomfortable with that. I talked him into it, but now I wish I hadnt. She keeps telling me not to worry about anything that she will take care of it all. But I want to worry about it, I want to be the one making the decisions. I want to help set up the church because she called my boss and requested like a week off for me. I wanted like 3 days. I have nothing to do and she wont let me help. Why am I even getting married. She keeps trying to give me advice about the marriage, saying "With my first husband we did this and it worked really really well." Aparantly it didnt, because you got divorced. "My second husband and I like to do it this way and it works really well." no it doesnt, you have been talking for 5 years about leaving him and he hates you. aIPOBUG0ISOEUNVOLJNVOAIUFD i'm just really frustrated.
elvenqueen elvenqueen
18-21, F
Aug 4, 2010