Doing This Alone?

Well, where do I start? I recently found out that I'm expecting. Due Sept 09. The father however, is not in the picture. We had split up (twice) before I found out the big news, and were not together at the time that I found out. We decided to give it one last chance, and less than a month later, it was very obvious that it wasn't going to work. At first, he was willing to be a part of everything, and be involved as much as possible. Since then, he has decided that he wants absolutely nothing to do with either of us. I'm not sad about the person, I'm sad about the situation. I never saw myself as a single mom. But, it looks like it's happening that way.

I try to stay positive about everything. On one side, I'm completely stoked that I'm FINALLY going to be a mother!! But, once again, never thought I'd be doing it alone.

I was recommended to this site... I see that others have posted similar stories to mine, but looks like it's been quite a while. Anybody still on here who may have some advice for me?

ready2grow ready2grow
3 Responses Mar 27, 2009

well this baby is now what 3 yrs old so how has it been?

Thank you very much ward and amyjo3. I appreciate your responses. It's amazing to me that there are so many people out there who care enough to take time out of their day, just to possibly help somebody they don't even know. It's awesome. Refills my faith in humanity. <br />
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Congrats amyjo3!!!! Let me know when that baby comes!!! Any day now. :)

Hi Ready 2 Grow! Well first off congrats on the baby, mine is due Monday and I am nervous as heck. I'm sorry to hear about your situation, being a single mom is tough but certainly no hurdle you can't get past. I am a single mom of 2 soon to be *gulp* 3 and I never intended on being alone and raising 3 children, but fate had other plans. The good thing is that you didn't seem to imply that the father is a bad person in anyway and that always leaves room for hope. Not so much that you can be with him, but hope that when the baby comes he will pick up the roll of dad. It doesn't seem fair at all that we have to go through the 9 months of the good, bad and ugly alone, but I try to remember that we already have a connection to our child. A physical (you can't get much more physical than actually living inside someone lol) connection and emotional connection that the man just does not have at this point. At this point in the game the only thing he has to wrap his head around is a though, a concept and if he has never been a father before of course he is having a hard time grasping the connection we perceive he should have. This isn't lack of caring for most men, we just have a glorified image in our head that the guy should be right there and all consumed from day one. Not usually the case, although there are men out there that probably are :). In any case, just relax and take time to truly enjoy your pregnancy. I have such a foggy memory of my first child because I was so wrapped up in dealing with her father (pretty much same situation as you are in now ) that I forgot to focus on the task at hand! Make sure to keep everyone updated on that baby!! *HUGS*