So Close, Yet So Far.

I am closer then I have ever been to another person in the way that only a pregent women can be, yet I can't embrace this child I carry as fully as I wish I could. I love my uborn chid so much, yet that love means that I question my firness to be a mother, and I am still trying to decide if I should give my baby in adopation to parents who can provide a better life for him or her. I'm only 3 months as I write this so I have time, but it is something that I ned to decide soon. It hurts to think of giving my child up, but I want the best life I can possably give my child. Can I as a single 29 year old women be both a mother and father to my child, can I teach and guide him or her so that they can grow up happy, and healthy? Is love enough? I don't know.
rescueangel rescueangel
26-30, F
2 Responses Jul 17, 2010

I think you can do it. Just be strong.<br />
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As a daughter, being with my real parent will mean everything to me. I would rather be with my real mother even if we live in a simple life than being adopted by other family who's rich. Being with our real mom means a lot.<br />
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Be strong and don't give up. =)

Maybe partly because I'm over 40 and don't have much time left for childbearing, when I found out I was pregnant I never had a thought about whether or not to continue the pregnancy or give my baby up for adoption. My financial situation is not good-- it will be a struggle to provide for him, especially in the beginning. I have a strong belief love is enough in my case and as long as I keep moving forward, the financial issues will work themselves out. As for being a single mother, I won't be the first woman ever doing that, and I can still ensure my son will have male role models in his life. I have less than a month to go now, and after all this-- throwing up for two months, seeing him through ultrasound, feeling him grow inside me, watching my ankles swell (lol), worrying that he'll be born safely-- I could never give him up. He has completely saved my life. I understand that for some, adopting out is the best choice they can make and it's made out of love, but it would be more pain than I could stand to hand my baby over to someone else at this point.<br />
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Best wishes in whatever you decide. Just know there is help and support for you out there if you decide this is what's meant for your life.