Ooi Put The Noose Around My Neck.. But Didnt Jump Off The Chair. Yet

don't. know. what. to do. I tried to hang myself last night...well I hung a noose around my neck.. but didnt jump off the chair. god that's insane I'm never like this. I knew when I was dong it..that I DON'T think like that. .I knew I was being irrational . And there was absolutely nothing I could do but watch my hands make a noose . This is NOT like me at all. I felt like ivwas watching someone else do this.. like I was powerless to stop it all. I'm under a lot of stress. I'm a student with deadlines. I found out I'm pregnant ..despite my attempts to prevent apregnancy... I am. Three days ago I found out I'm carrying twins... to make it worse I drove by my bf house yesterday morning abt 6:30am and ge wasn't home. After repeatedly calling him he answered telling me he was at home. I told him to come out..and he hung up not answering for three hours.. swears he slept in his car...whatever.. he got me pregnant on purpose without consulting me.. I was going to abort but uts TWINS i...I..can't.. what am I goi ng to do? I can't handle the way I feel... I'm afraid...
cara4ever cara4ever
31-35, F
Nov 30, 2012