Pregnant And Don't Know If I Should Stay?

I met my boyfriend over a year ago and we started off as bed buddies. I met him through a friend who said he was her cousin. Little did I know, that they were actually long time exes and were also sleeping together. I felt disgusted. Then I left for 3 months for training and came back. Originally, I wanted nothing to do with him. Then one night I was bored and had him come pick me up. Right off the bat, we spent almost every day and night together for a month until becoming official. Everything seemed perfect then I started having suspicions. He'd wake up an hour early to "take his guy to work" or he'd leave, come back and say his work schedule was off. Then more suspicions started when I found out he was hitting up another one of his bed buddies. Finally, on valentine's, I hacked into his emails and facebook (I know, it's bad. But I installed a keylogger on MY laptop that he was using to try to sleep with other girls-keep reading!). What I found devasted me. Not only did I just go through a miscarriage with his baby, but throughout our ENTIRE relationship, he's been trying to sleep with other girls via facebook, craigslist, and through the 16 sex/online-dating profiles he made DURING our relationship. I also found out he was sending pics (and had pics up on his profiles), recieving pictures, and telling girls he was single and wanted nsa fun. I busted him out, he lied, and things got heated between the two of us. He actually started crying and I was the one who apologized, though I did nothing wrong. Ever since then, I haven't found him doing anything else (as in seeking out other girls), but I'm also 3 months pregnant again. He says he's not going to do anything again, that's he's sorry and an idiot, but he had me fooled AGAIN, even while I was pregnant before, and I don't think this time is any different.

He and I live together, he works 1st shift full time and I only work part-time. I want to end things SOMETIMES but I don't have anywhere else to go. My parents already told me they don't have room, my aunts don't and neither do my grandparents. I also tell myself that I'm with him because I DO think he'll end up a good guy, but part of me thinks it's just because he's all I have for now. What do I do??
ashbdrx ashbdrx
18-21, F
2 Responses May 11, 2012

You should try and work a full time job, and save up some money and leave him. If he wants to be apart of his childs life, don't deny him that, but it's obvious that he has a problem with being faithful.

I too am pregnant, 30 weeks to be exact... And I also have trust issues with my boyfriend, who was my ex at the time we hooked up and I ended up pregnant. When I told him I thought I may be pregnant I was even on birth control, but I remember missing pills and that was around the time I had sex with him. He was also "seeing" another girl that he told me was just his friend. Little did I know, it was more serious than that and I got played. So he told me he ended it with her, and I tried to make sure he wasn't seeing her still behind my back, and he told me to my face that I could trust him. Let me tell you this though, I should have known better because the reason why he was my ex was because he cheated before. Not once or twice but a few times and also sent pictures to numerous girls. So as time went on and I got bigger, I though things were perfect between us. I still gave him his space to be with his friends, supposedly all guys... And come to find out he has been cheating on me with that girl for 2 months. Yeah... Killer. Living in a small town pays off sometimes, but then everyone knows your business. I went to the girl and she fessed up before he did. He kept the lie going until I went to her. He always told me he loved me and we have been on again, off again for 2 years. I know how you feel, but if you trust he has changed... Go with your gut. That is what I am doiing. A women's intuition is exquisite and we do feel things... Just go with whatever your heart is saying, but if you can't live with what you did... You have to be strong and you may have to do it on your own. I have thought of it many times... But I love him so much for many reasons, and he is a good guy when he wants to be. He is great with kids and makes my heart melt when I watch him. I just am as unsure as you are. But I am going with my heart and my gut. Your baby deserves the best. And you need to be stress free. Just take that road, the stress free one.