She Is the Sweetest Thing In My Life!

My granddaughter lives with us. She has on and off for her short 6 years on this earth. She is the apple of my eye.

My daughter and her father met while they were at Job Corps together.  He seemed like such a nice guy, trying to impress us with what he was going to do with his life. Our daugher fell in love with him, they got married and she became pregnant with my sweetie. Little did I know for a while that he was an abuser. He was a sick, jealous, religious zealot who thinks he is a prophet. He beat my daughter, robbed her of  her self respect and her self esteem. When she had my granddaughter, I went to see them in the hospital. He never left us alone together, always there, always afraid of what my daughter might say, I guess. A couple of months later, she calls and tells me she is being abused. I drive 200 miles to get her and my granddaughter, bring them home  and get them settled. 2 weeks later she is back with him!  I'm sick, sick i tell you! This happened several times and physically affected my health. I was one big hive, itching like a giant mosquito bite~ 4 months later, I get a call from a battered woman's shelter. My daughter and granddaughter are there and she is pretty battered. I drive 200 miles and get them again. I bring her to a battered woman's shelter near our home so she can get the help she needs. She stays a few weeks and moves in with us. We are threatened with death and burning our house down by her husband. We get restraining order and I have a gun at my side 24-7. My daughter starts going buck wild, partying, lying, etc. We help her move out by herself and she turned to drugs. My granddaughter was living in deplorable conditions and I went over one day to get her and it was just horrible. I had to make the most difficult decision of my life and that was to call DFACS and have my granddaughter removed from her mother.  She came to live with us. She was about 2 at the time. When she was 3 1/2 her mother went into a group home/family rehab. After 3 months she was able to have her daughter with her. She stayed there nearly a year and graduated from that program.  When it was time to leave there, we agreed that my granddaughter would come live with me and start Kindergarten while my daughter got on her feet. She had section 8 housing but she is too sorry to hold a job to help herself. She thinks she is getting her daughter after the school year is over but I have news for her! She is a sorry individual, liar and she herself became a religious zealot who relies on the church to help her sorry ***.  I never raised my child to be like this. I don't know what went wrong but I do know that she is 27 now and there's nothing I can do for her but to tell her I love her and hope she will finally make a right decision. I can't help her anymore.

Thanks for reading my story. I don't have any more tears to cry about this.

Jojo

JojoWazoo JojoWazoo
46-50, F
11 Responses Mar 3, 2009

I'm also lucky to have her too! She is such a funny, quirky kid.<br />
She's just a little lonely out here by herself with us "old folks."<br />
She is learning to read so that's fun.

this little girl is lucky to have the love from someone like you!

Thank you for all of your sweet, thoughtful comments..... Being my first grandchild, I have loved her with all of my heart.<br />
I think the hardest thing for me is knowing she misses her mother so much. She doesn't understand the situation and I never want her to think I kept her from her mother. <br />
Don't get me wrong, she has a great life here and her uncles and aunts adore her. She is Pawpaw's girl but it's still sad just the same. I go have lunch with her in school at least once a week and I'm involved in PTA (sigh, again)<br />
She cheerleads and softball. It's tough but worth it.<br />
Thanks again.<br />
Jo

My wife and I raised our granddaughter from the age of 7. We adopted her at 15 to avoid ongoing wrangling over who she was living with and where child support is going. It is tough. My heart goes out to you.

This story tore my heart out. My daughter and her baby are living with us now, and as hard as that is, we are so grateful there is no abuse or drug use involved. We were just talking about this the other day. That little girl is so lucky to have you or she'd be lost in the system. Kudos to you for loving this child enough to take her in and give her a life. As far as your daughter is concerned, all you can do is love her and hope something turns her around. You have my sincere admiration and I wish the best outcome for all of you!

You're sweet to say so. Thanks for reading and giving your thoughts on my story. It's been such a genuine heartache. I'm glad I finally wrote it, it helped my psyche some to unload it. All I can say is that after raising 5 kids, I hate getting up to get her up in the morning for school! LOL That's the only thing I'd change!

It is most certainly sad, but so many things are in life. You are making the best of a situation that is out of your control. You can always keep hope and everyone has the capability of changing, but for now you are doing the best you can. I see that as admirable. :)

Thank you so much, Krypton. It's such a sad situation. She misses her mommy so much. My husband and I were talking about it yesterday, her thinking she's going back to her Mommy when school is out for the summer. I just can't let it happen with no job and being so far behind in her bills and all. And she will never know her sick assed father. I used to try and be nice and send him e-mailed pictures of her but even that got out of hand and abusive. It's sad, really.

That little girl is lucky to have such a strong and wonderful grandma as yourself. HUGS

Thank you. I really believe she is delusional and she can't help herself. I just can't help her anymore. You can't help someone who won't even help them self!

I am sorry for what you are going through.<br />
I have been on both sides of that coin believe it or not,but I can definitely tell you ,you are doing the right thing...And I hope your daughter really gets the help that she needs,she has to really want it herself .